70. A Lingering Concern

※Below was translated by Sephallia. Thank you very much.

※Told from Lambert Orso’s perspective.

“Heyo dad, I came to check up on you.”

“Hey Simone, perfect timing, I just hit a good place to take a break.”

When I saw my beloved daughter approach with a pitcher filled with juice in one hand and a glass in the other, I felt my expression soften. It was then I noticed that Simone was the one who was oddly stiff. Taking a closer look, despite her efforts to hide it, I couldn’t help but feel her earlier cheer was hiding her anxiousness.

“Did something happen?”

“Huh? Mmn, no, not really?”

“It’s not good to lie, Simone. Come on over, let’s talk about it.”

“Geez, dad you’re such a worrywart.”

Even as she wore an awkward smile, Simone joined me at a table in the corner of my workspace.

“Are the repairs going well?”

“Yeah, they’re moving along. I’d been commissioned to make adjustments to the gates before, but it’s the first time I’ve had to do such large scale repairs. It’s been a very interesting and fulfilling project to work on.”

“Tinkering with gadgets like this really is an obsession to you, huh.”

“Please don’t say it like that… Lene’s been on my case about it too.”

I’d always been fascinated about the details about how things work and the beauty of logic. That was the reason I’d been passionate about math and Magic Tool Engineering. I just loved seeing all the different components harmonize into a perfect system.

Yes, that’s how I’d always been. However, after adopting Simone, something new had been added to that set of core values. Something that logic could never measure. The chaotic world of emotions―I’d come to value my emotions more than I had before.

Perhaps because of how things turned out with Lene, for a long time I’d avoided dealing with my emotions. Of course, I didn’t intend to put the blame on Lene. This was my own sin. Perhaps, had I been able to suppress my feelings better, things may have turned out differently.

That’s right, even though we’re both satisfied with our current lifestyle, I still sometimes think that way.

―Whoops, I’ve gone a little off topic.

Regardless, welcoming Simone into our lives was a huge change both for Lene and for me. Raising a child was like its own kind of war.

Simone was, for the most part, a mature and well-behaved child. She was also very clever for her age, but undoubtedly, still a child. She would occasionally throw a tantrum, and every day of our lives back in Appalachia was both chaotic and fulfilling. My life with Lene and Simone―my beloved family―was my personal paradise.

There was a time when I wondered if I, who had committed such a grave sin, truly deserved to be this happy. I felt especially guilty toward Lene. After all, I was the reason that she was forced to leave Claire-sama’s side. Even after the two of them had managed to reconcile, my sense of guilt still remained. I thought that this sense of guilt was one that I’d have to bear for the rest of my life.

That was until one day, when Lene asked, “Would you be open to adopting a child?” Even after we entered a relationship, the two of us strictly abstained from sexual activity. Rei-san had warned us about the potential dangers of one’s bloodline becoming too thick. That certainly played a part in our choice, but even more than that, the guilt I felt was what got in the way. As a result, we’d both long given up on the idea of having children. So when Lene brought up that suggestion, I was very surprised.

However, the more I thought about it, the more that sounded like a good idea. The thought of a future where Lene and I had someone who we could devote our love to, sounded like a very happy one. It would be a good thing for a child as well, after all, that child would gain a family.

That’s not to say that I didn’t feel anxious about it. I knew both Claire-sama and Rei-san rather well. I considered them prodigies, and I’d heard that even those two had gone through a difficult time trying to welcome Alea-chan and Mei-chan into their family. I was confident Lene would be a great parent, but could someone like me really be someone’s father?

I wondered if adopting a child was something we were pursuing only for our own self satisfaction.

I decided to ask Claire-sama and Rei-san for their input. The two of them listened to me seriously, and after I’d said my piece, Claire-sama was the one to say,

―Welcoming a new life into your family, when all is said and done, it’s all about your passion.

Her words seemed to somehow sink straight into the depths of my heart. To the uninitiated, her words may have come off as simplistic or irresponsible. But no, that wasn’t it.

I knew Claire-sama to be a very thoughtful person. The act of adoption, the act of welcoming a life, when considered in terms of logic, it would always reduce back to being about one’s ego. She knew that. That’s why she decided to phrase it in that specific way. Everything I’d felt when considering the possibility of welcoming a life into my family. The resolve, the responsibility, the meaning, and even this slight sense of resignation. All of it could be found within that one word.

“Dad?”

“Hm? Ah, sorry, I was just lost in my thoughts.”

As you may be able to see, the path to becoming a good father still stretches long into the distance. Every single day, I continue my struggle struggle, slowly learning to be a better father.

Even so, I don’t want to use my inadequacies as an excuse. I want Simone to think of me as the most reliable father in the world.

“So? Just what happened?”

“Like I said, it’s nothing.”

“Really? To me, it looks like you’re feeling pretty down.”

“… Dad, it’s unfair how sharp you can be. I mean normally you’re just kinda spaced out.”

And so, little by little, Simone told me what was bothering her. Her birth, the demons’ recent actions, and her anxieties about what might happen in the future.

“But really, this is my problem. I really shouldn’t have brought it up with Alea and Lily, I gotta apologize.”

“Hm… I think if you apologized, you’d just make them feel lonely.”

“Huh? Lonely?”

Simone just gave me a blank stare. Looks like I’d need to explain.

“The two of them are your friends, right?”

“Yeah, they’re really good friends.”

“Try changing your positions, if Alea-chan suddenly told you, ‘This is my problem.’ And she drew the line, how would you feel?”

“… I see, yeah, that would make me lonely.”

As I’d stated earlier, Simone was rather sharp. Even after just explaining one step, she could extrapolate and understand the tenth or even twentieth.

“If there’s something you’re worried about, let them worry with you. In exchange, when they’re worried about something, you should share that burden with them too.”

“Is that what you did when you were a kid too, dad?”

“… Your dad… Wasn’t able to do that properly and ended up causing a lot of trouble for a lot of people.”

It was a bitter experience.

“Simone, you might think it’s unfair that I’m asking you to do something I wasn’t able to do myself. However, if possible, I don’t want you to have to go through the same regrets.”

“Oh come on dad, you don’t have to be so uptight. It’s not like you or I are saints.”

“Thank you for saying that.”

“Well, I’ll make sure to keep what you said in mind. I think I’ve calmed down, thanks dad.”

With that, Simone flashed a smile brighter than the one she’d forced previously. I felt relieved.

“Ah, changing topics but, did anything about Alea-chan change after she entered the Empire?”

“Alea? I don’t think so, she’s just how she always is.”

“Is that so…”

In that case, was “that” just me overthinking things?

“Ah wait, come to think of it! I don’t know if this is related, but after coming here she mentioned her colorlessness didn’t seem to be working. We still don’t know why though.”

“―!”

It seems my worries weren’t unfounded.

“Simone, if you’re ever having a hard time, I’m sure Alea-chan would lend a hand.”

“What are you saying so suddenly? But yeah, I’m sure she would. I mean, she already has helped me out in numerous ways.”

“Right. That’s why, if she’s ever having a hard time, Simone, I want you to do the same for her.”

“Hm? Well, yeah, of course I would.”

Simone was clearly confused.

“Uh, did something happen to Alea?”

“I can’t quite say for sure yet. The data we retrieved from the dungeon contained some interesting information, but I’m still in the process of discussing it with Philine-sama.”

“Philine-sama? Why are you suddenly bringing her into this?”

“The scope of the implications is just rather large. I’m sorry but at this point in time, even if you’re my daughter, I’m unable to share the details with you.”

I didn’t want to make her more anxious than necessary either

“Simone, please just forget about what I said for now. What’s more important is that you keep strong and don’t let what the demons are doing bother too much.”

“Asking me to just forget seems kinda unfair, but fine, for now. I’ll be okay, and you can leave Alea to me as well.”

“Sure, that’s my girl.”

“Alright then, I should probably return. I’m sure Alea-and Lily have been worried about me.”

We said our farewells and Simone returned to the lodgings.

“Alright, I guess it’s time for me to get back to work.”

That said however, there was something I was worried about. The curse that ALea-chan had once carried in her blood, the colorlessness that she’d lost, the data we’d retrieved from the dungeon, and Yunette-chan.

If I were to try and sum up my concerns―

“This gate… should we really be fixing it?”

―――――――――

That concludes Chapter 7.

We will be taking a little more time before releasing Chapter 8.

I would be happy if you could look forward to it.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts and feedback.