Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero: 160

Unfortunately, I’m Not A Hero: 160

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Commissioned by Shaderic

Wordcount: 2500

…

“Sup.”

I greeted Roseanne with a raised hand, while entering her royal tent.

After intercepting the heir to the Empire, we relocated to the cover of a mountain right next to the pass in the mountain range. Not too close so that someone could collapse the mountain side on us, but also with enough cover to protect from any potshots. I wanted to take them all the way back to Arundel, but Mr. Emperor-To-Be was sending his people out to take supplies and people from across the mountain range.

I’d worry about him and his commanders trying something, but Roseanne’s troops outnumbered them five to one, and my own troops outnumbered them two to one.

It was overkill even if they tripled in size, basically.

“Hachiman, why am I not surprised that you’re already here to make my day worse?” Roseanne grimaced behind her desk. She had tea being served by some maids. Her hair was slightly wet, so I could only suppose that she was fresh from the bath. Thankfully, she knew propriety and subscribed to the idea, therefore she was fully clothed… actually fully clothed, too. I’m glad to have my only superior Kindred be actually sane and dress normally. “So, you settled the matter?”

“Didn’t bother to catch the commander’s name, but they hit a new type of Empire castle. Much better defended than usual, so they decided to settle for a siege.” I’d taken a bath before entering the tent and had a fresh set of clothes on. After the quick bout of combat and travel, I kinda wanted to take a nap, but bully-reporting to Roseanne was the best course of action. “We hid our approach, dodged the attacks, and dropped the vanguard right into the castle. Then, we came back after taking their arms and armor.”

Roseanne was quiet for a second, before pinching the bridge of her nose.

“You’re gloating to me about invalidating most known forms of fortifications completely, aren’t you?”

“Yep.”

Roseanne released a sigh of long suffering, before grimacing.

“You’re here to talk about the matter of taking human males from other worlds.” Roseanne took a sip of tea, and glanced at her maid. Soon enough, I had a small table with my own cup and a small plate of snacks beside it. Human-sized portions. Roseanne had an eye for detail. “From my current information, I’ve found that the advancements you’ve created have sharply curtailed the demand for men. However, the issue lies with the fact that the spell itself has been lusted over by my people for centuries.”

“Mhmm. I get that.” The Kindred could’ve just reinforced their borders and washed their hands of the Empire once their diets were satiated. The physiological need for men was due to them needing male mana as fuel for their high-energy requirements. While I partly introduced the changes to logistics and started industrializing food production for the money, the primary goal was to make men no longer a resource. “So, what are you going to do about it?’

“Ideally, I’d be rid of the magic forever and never have to deal with it. It is a piece of magic that threatens the stability of not only the continent, but the entire world. It’s a miracle that the Empire’s actions haven’t resulted in far more terrible creatures invading our realm.” Roseanne made her thoughts on the matter clear. “But from my interactions with my nobility, it’s clear that they want the magic for themselves… and will try to depose me, if I refuse.”

“Fuck’em. Let them try and lose all they want.” Roseanne glared at me, which I gave a shrug to.

“You’re you, so I’m sure you’ll try to be diplomatic. A few people will listen, but most won’t. Just kill those who don’t and parcel out the lands to the loyal.”

“You can’t be serious. Right after a victory over the Empire?”

“I’m completely serious. At this rate, it’s only a matter of time before things blow up anyway. The nobility is already losing power, and you have the support of the public. Might as well commit to a revolution while high off a victory.” Roseanne glowered at me, while we casually discussed heading a revolution that centralized power into her hands after the war. “If you don’t do it, if you stall for a few decades, you’ll get into a more devastating civil war with less support and this new Empire you’re propping up will probably back away and leave you hanging.”

My mention of the civil war being worse in the future made Roseanne pause.

She was more than aware of the changes I made to the Kindred. In fact, she probably knew more than me, since she could easily compare it to how things were in the past for her people. With her knowledge of the past, experience in how things were going in the present, she could make a guess at the future.

And, quite frankly, that future was one filled with Kindred fighting on the industrial scale, with all the new weapons and tactics developed, and the prosperity born from years of economic progress.

It was going to be a bloodbath that would drench the continent in more blood than the last century of war against the Empire.

“I see.” Roseanne finished her cup of tea and glanced at her food. It took her a moment, but she forced herself to eat. I took that as a cue to take a nibble of my own food. If it was poisoned, at least I’ll die knowing that I didn’t have to suffer working for a stupid boss. Alas, the food tasted good and nothing went amiss. Wait, didn’t I have an artifact on me that protected against poison? If I didn’t, why didn’t I? “I’ll keep that all in mind.”

I shrugged at Roseanne’s noncommittal answer, and kept snacking.

It took a while for her to ask the real question, though.

“…what will you do, if such a war comes about over the summoning ritual?” Roseanne asked with a wary gaze. A stillness seemed to permeate the room. I felt A’Bel manifest right behind me without a summoning, while a few Kunoichi rose up. It was a good show of force and support. “What do you intend to do, Hikigaya Hachiman?”

At the start of all of this, I wanted the summoning matrix gone for good, erased from history alongside the Empire, and all research into it outlawed.

But after working with so much magic, advancing it, and implementing it in so many ways, I didn’t have the same views on it like I usually did.

“I’m fine heavily regulating it, now. I guess. Aiming it at loners, people about to die, or maybe freaks of nature who are better off broken into rutting beasts sounds okay. Stealing people with prospects, relatives, and families are off limits, naturally.” I let loose a sigh. It felt wrong to say it, like I was admitting that made a mistake. But after all this time, I couldn’t deny that magic and spells were tools. Things that were used to achieve something. In that regard, the way I used magic was just as terrible as what the Empire did, albeit in different avenues. I’ve killed tens of thousands with arcane poison and disease, driven more to madness by calling upon eldritch horrors, and had thousands of minds intruded upon by arcane spells. I'm a hypocrite, but I still have some standards. “Either create a whole organization whose job it is to summon people, or make an organization that can monitor whatever private sector corporation that pops up to do the job, and make them strong as hell.”

Roseanne raised an eyebrow at my admission of incredible maturity.

“You realize that anyone who has control over such department will have a ridiculous amount of influence over the continent… and with your standards and the demands of all the rest… they’ll have a horrific time no matter how much influence or power they wield.”

I nodded at those words.

“I’ll hand you a roster in two weeks, and let’s choose the poor bitch with the job then.”

Rosanne returned my nod, stood up, and reached out with her hand.

“Sounds great.”

We shook on ruining some poor wretch’s life on that day and left each other to our mutual ends.

Delegation is truly the best superpower.

What’s that?

We’re probably going to be ruining someone’s life?

Well, with what’s at stake and what they’ll have control over, it’s better than making their life better!

…

A’Bel walked close by as I went back to my ship.

Given the fact that she changed from armor to a slinky, backless number with a cleavage just above her belly button that was very familiar to me, I knew that she wanted to talk to me about something.

“I was simply wondering what your plans are for this mortal realm, my dear summoner, after your vengeance has been completed.” A’Bel shrunk down, just so that she could take a hold of my arm and lean on my shoulder. Not even close to my height, though. Her face wasn’t leaning on my shoulder. It was all sideboob. Top of my head, the whole right of my face, and even some of the back. All bare sideboob. Wew. “Is there any conquest for me to look forward to? Any glorious battles?”

“You’re free to go back to hell if you want. I’m not keeping you around just for you to cause trouble.” I grunted and resisted the urge to utilize the ludicrous oppai-tunity spilling over my shoulder and eradicating my right side’s field of vision. The more I acknowledged what was there, the more the vastness of A’Bel’s A’Bels became apparent. Is this the reversed equivalent of being slapped in the face by dick? “We’re probably going to work as Roseanne’s secret police, while she gets her professional army up and running.”

A national police force for the continent that could put down insurrections was going to be handy in the post-war era. Kindred unity behind the Demon Lord was born from the Empire’s threat, because they’ll get cut down piece by piece if they didn’t unite. With the Empire’s practically destroyed, the Kindred are going to see each other as competition and the pacts of unity as chains keeping them down.

“That should be enough battle to sate me, especially with Kindred as foes… but what shall you do, my dear summoner?” A’bel asked, while pressing against me even more. Is marshmallow hell possible with just one boob? It seems like my Demon was going to try. “Have you changed your mind on researching a way to get home?”

I almost laughed at that question.

“Hell no. If these guys want another world to call theirs, they’ll figure out rocketry and space exploration like all the rest. That’s off limits. I’m not going to unleash Kindred on every dimension.” These guys can stick around here and figure things out. Sure, I’d like to see my family again, but proving that you can send one person here to another place was a good way to start off thoughts of interdimensional conquest. I wasn’t willing to deal with that. “I’ll be looking into getting all the things I want here. Air conditioning, television, games, and all the food I want, while expanding and strengthening Ylstu.”

I thought that A’Bel was going to be displeased with me and my desires, but the Demon just shivered in delight.

“A whole city dedicated entirely to providing you with the luxury you desire. No, an entire world, overturned from all it knows because you want the luxuries you once had. Wonderful. The ultimate selfishness.”

“I wouldn’t say ultimate. It’s normal.” I grunted and reached the gangway of my ship. A’Bel let go at the glares of several of my soldiers and returned to her usual height. The right side of my hair was messed up. Bed head. Or, I suppose in this case, breast head. I started ascending up the walkway. “I want what I want and I’ll get it by dragging everyone else along for the ride. How else am I going to spend my time with all the years I’ll be getting?”

I reached the top of my ship and took a deep breath.

I’d like to think that I haven’t changed much, because I wanted to spite the Empire. In the end, I wanted to look at the Empire and say that even if they broke me, I put myself back together. However, the path I chose had its own changes. I’m no longer normal, let alone the person who I once was.

I didn’t hold any illusions about my future.

My citizens and the people who cared for me will go out of their way to keep me alive as long as possible, and with the assets I had at my disposal, that looked like forever. It was a daunting notion, and something that I didn’t want with the Empire in the play, but that was no longer the case. The Empire was as good as dead, and I wanted to keep it that way. Not only that, but with the technological revolution underway, it’ll only be a matter of time (relatively speaking) when this whole situation modernizes to something recognizable to me.

Cars, television, flight, video games, internet, and more are going to take off… and more importantly, I won’t be staying as I am while everyone around me dies.

The people with me now will be with me, as well.

Now that I thought about…

“The best revenge is a life well lived… so, I guess I’ll be spending the rest of my existence fucking the Empire over by being the most spoiled and successful person to ever fucking exist.” I grunted and let loose a laugh, as I reached the deck of my ship. I glanced back over my shoulder and I found A’Bel’s eyes wide in excitement and a ferocious smile on her face. Living a fantastic life after murdering your enemies and eradicating them from history, I suppose, resonated with the Archdemon. “So, how does that sound, A’Bel? Good enough for you to stick around, as long as there’s a few fights here and there?”

A’Bel reached out for me to help her up onto the deck, even though she had no trouble, and I obliged as she ascended.

Her answer left her lips like a purr.

“My dear master, I would love for nothing more than to see you live in luxury, while your foes are forgotten forever.”

Yeah, I thought so.

In the end, as fantastic and forward my plan was, it was fueled by spite against those who wronged me.

A Demon would naturally approve.