DxD: Celeste 12: Interlude: Hyoudou

DxD: Celeste 12: Interlude: Hyoudou

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Commissioned by Chaosbrain and Althero

Wordcount: 2000

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Some would say that a man only has two hands, so he must only hold one pair of breasts.

I say that a man must work hard, and become an incredible person, so that his two hands is enough for many breasts.

I liked you better when you were stupid.

Ddraig’s voice entered my head and interrupted my meditation.

I haven’t had a vessel who has ever practiced meditation, but I’m sure that’s not it.

Good morning to you, too!

Hmph.

I got up and checked the clock.

It was 5AM.

Ever since the changes to my body, I needed a lot less sleep, thinking was a lot easier, and outgrew all of my clothes within a month.

If only it crippled your libido, too.

That was impossible, since in Celeste-sensei’s universe, they were cornered and with a limited population. However, with their incredible industry, they were more than able to create orbital cities and arcologies that only needed population. Thus, they would never cripple the libido of humanity, unless they found themselves losing to the point of not being able to provide.

They wouldn’t cripple a normal person’s libido, but certainly yours would’ve been.

Celeste-sensei said my other self had a happy harem.

…well, shit. You got me there.

I stretched and put on my tracksuit, so that I could get some exercise in the morning, before school.

Augh, but that’s boring. You read through the entire curriculum already. All we do there is read manga and light novels in textbooks and they’re mostly trash.

It’s a part of being normal and interacting with my fellow human beings, also I had people to look after who weren’t used to it.

Fine, fine, but we should still find something to kill or fight. It doesn’t even need to be strong. You just need to get some blood on your hands, because this world is too peaceful.

It’s a good complaint to have as far as I was concerned. Celeste-sensei liked talking a lot about her Earth, but when she showed it to me in a hologram, what I saw frightened me.

Vast gluts of land stripped bare by Chimera.

Nuclear winter gripping the entire world.

A few spreading webs of light across a nearly, totally-dark planet.

They won, she wanted to go back and see her friends, but I didn’t know if I could ever go to her world and not feel miserable.

Ddraig, surprisingly, had nothing to grumble about at that and didn’t talk until I reached the outside of my house.

Surprisingly, Le Fay-san and Jeanne-san were both there, too.

“Good morning!” I greeted them both with a smile and did my best to keep some distance between us. Strange things happened when we were around each other. Things that made me excited and very happy, but it made them both embarrassed, so I did my best to be mindful and make sure the accidents didn’t happen. “So, you’re both joining me in my run, today?”

Le Fay answered first with a bow and a small smile.

“Good morning, Hyoudou-sama.” Le Fay was always formal and polite, but not because she wanted to stay away from other people. It was just how she preferred to speak to others. I was a little worried that she was putting herself down by holding other people up, but in a way, she was also raising them up to her own pedigree. Or, something similar. “Yes, I’ll be in your care today.”

“I don’t like being cooped up all the time, so if I can go out, I will!” Jeanne was more excitable and spoke her mind more freely. She told me that she didn’t trust me the very first day we met. She was an honest girl, but sometimes she crossed lines that she didn’t know she shouldn’t. Sometimes, she looked at my parents in a way that I had to put my foot down, but after I made it clear that wasn’t allowed, she stopped. “C’mon, then. Let’s go, Ise-kun!”

The two blondes, one short and the other tall, nodded at me while wearing their own tracksuits.

They didn’t look like they were part of a group that killed innocent, non-human people, but they were.

And, I didn’t look like their warden, but I was.

Still, though, Celeste-sensei told me to look after them and help rehabilitate them because they were savable and potential allies in the future.

And, Celeste-sensei was practically never wrong.

So, I nodded at them both and gave them a thumbs up, before pointing over to the nearest mountain top.

“Alright, we have an hour before breakfast, so we’re getting to the summit in thirty minutes and getting back in another thirty!” I gave them both a smile, while Ddraig chuckled in my head. Le Fay-san paled quickly and Jeanne froze at my words. “Don’t worry, if you get tired, I’ll fly over and pick you both up and bring you home! But… only if you’re really, really tired!”

I gave them both a smile.

It was a little mean, but exercise was a good way to know yourself and clear out your mind.

My two wards can’t get into any funny business, if they were tired, after all!

…

“Every time I see it, I still can’t believe you can eat that much, Issei.”

“Yeah.”

Matsuda and Motohama both stared at my tray of food and so did a lot of others. I had a lunch from home, a set from the cafeteria, and three breads from the school bakery. It was enough food for three people and it was barely enough for me until dinner.

“W-well, puberty’s weird and I’m working out a lot nowadays!” I tried to laugh, but I was focused on eating all that I can. Celeste-sensei told me that she’d start sending me nutrient blocks to help supplement my diet as a growing boy, but that wasn’t going to happen until next week. So, for the time being, I had to make do with regular food. It was a little embarrassing. “I have a feeling it’ll end pretty soon though!”

“Uh-huh.”

“Sure.”

Both of my friends didn’t believe me, but they noticed that I was embarrassed and changed topics quickly.

And, they were suddenly angry and pointed at me together.

“Tell us what you did to get two transfer students in your house!”

“Did you sell your soul to the Devil!?”

I almost chocked on my soup at their claim.

“W-what, no!” The official cover story for both Le Fay and Jeanne was that they were friends of my from exchanging letters whose families allowed them to come over. My parents were eager to accept, especially with the payments from their families (Celeste), paying for their care and renovations to the house. I thought my parents were strange about just allowing it, until I saw the number of zeroes in the checks that Celeste-sensei sent. It wasn’t brainwashing or anything, but the power of money sure was frightening. “I told you, they’re just my friends from abroad! I sent letters to practice my English and French, while they studied Japanese! I didn’t even know what they looked at until they came over!”

Matsuda and Motohama both loomed over me from across the table and I did my best to remain calm as they looked down on me like twin demons. Despite how terrifying Celeste-sensei was when she was training me, I could barely withstand the glares of my two friends.

Beat them up and then have a feast with them after you win.

Ddraig’s advice was very unhelpful, but thankfully I was saved by the two girls they were asking me about in the first place.

“Ise, I need more money!” Jeanne came first and her arms were laden with a dozen different bread items. Her eyes gleamed as she put them all down and extended her hand towards me. Reflexively, I got out my wallet to give her money, before realizing. I already gave her money! “Tch!”

“Jeanne-san, that’s plenty of food.” Celeste was adamant that I don’t spoil the two of them. Well, technically, we were already spoiling them both plenty for the things that they did, even if they didn’t do as much damage as the others in their group. “There’s going to be more tomorrow, so just wait until then. Or, spend some of your allowance outside of school in a café.”

“But they’re more expensive outside of school!” Jeanne groaned and began to chow down. She ate most of the bread items in two bites. Whether it was melon bread, yakisoba pan, or even curry buns, it was two bites and they vanished. She had an appetite as large as mine, which wasn’t much of a surprise since she could almost keep up with me, even when I pushed myself. “But, fine! You’re taking me and paying for some of it, though!”

“I-I want to go somewhere after school too, Hyoudou-sama.” Le Fay protested and sat next to me. Her meal was normal, just fish, rice, and soup. It was strange, because casting magic was supposed to be very taxing on the body. Why was she eating so little all the time? Without thinking, I gave her one of my breads. “Oh, thank you very much!”

Jeanne immediately stared at my other, remaining bread, and I gave it to her without a word.

“Okay, let’s all go downtown after school and find somewhere to do our homework.”

Jeanne and Le Fay both looked pleased at my words, before I suddenly stiffened as a wave of killing intent washed over me.

Motohama and Matsuda were both glaring at me from across the table, they were biting their lower lips, and so frustrated that I thought that they were going to cry tears of blood. Their eyes were both bloodshot enough for me to worry about that, and their faces were incredibly red.

I gulped before addressing them both.

“G-guys!?”

I didn’t get to finish my question, as they both rose up with their trays in hand.

“Y-you idiot!” Motohama cried out. “You’ve betrayed us!”

A stabbing pain registered in my heart.

“J-just because you got taller and buffer and better looking… doesn’t mean you need to become a damn normie!” Matsuda cried out too, and I felt like I received a punch in my stomach. Guys!? “And… and I don’t hang around damn normies!”

Both my friends turned their backs to me and I felt my heart ache.

I understood that they were heated and felt betrayed, and that overcame the frustration I felt for them.

Suddenly, one of their fellow perverts became everything they hated, even on the surface, and so they could only lash out.

Without a moment’s hesitation, I forgave them both and stood up to tell them both that wasn’t the case and that I was still with them as a pervert myself… when disaster struck.

You call it disaster. I call it complete nonsense.

I got up and for some reason so did Jeanne and Le Fay.

Whatever they had planned and what I had in mind didn’t matter, as the table caught onto one thing or another, and went flying upward, scaring all three of us at once with noise, movement, and a sudden deluge of food everywhere.

Then, there was a tangling of limbs, of bodies, and confusion all at once.

Only for the worst thing possible at the moment to occur.

I’d caught bought of them, as I wanted to keep them safe from any accidents, but their thrashing and movements resulted in their blouses popping open and my face getting mashed into their bra-covered breasts.

Soft.

Perky.

Perfect.

For a second, I relaxed as my happy place existed all around my face… then I heard the cry from my two friends.

“D-damn you, bastard!”

“I’ll get you for this, Issei!”

I’ve achieved paradise.

But at what cost?

Your brain might be faster, but you’re still a damn boob-obsessed moron.