Life-Bot: Industrial Accident

Apprently Patreon thinks I'm promoting a raffle. Well, guess we'll see what happens I guess.

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'Welp, this ain't good. This ain't good at all!' Bobby thought to himself as he lay motionless in the pile of packing peanuts, his eyes locked on the ceiling overhead. He couldn't move, couldn't blink, all the redneck could do was just lay there waiting for whatever was going to happen next. Last thing the overweight, balding, and admittingly, slightly smelly Alabama native could remember was getting to the Life-Bot factory with his best buddy, Joey, and on their way to pick up their prize rewards. They’d entered the ‘Life-Bot 5000 ten millionth sale giveaway’, a once in a lifetime contest that was being held by the Life-Bot Corporation, the inventors of the incredible and eponymous, Life-Bot! If you won, you and a guest got an all expenses paid, first class trip to the Life-Bot factories and, best of all, a custom made Life-bot for you AND your guest! It was a no-brainer, and over two billion people had entered the contest. Against all odds, somehow Bobby had won! And he’d brought his bud Joey along for the ride! Bobby wanted to blink as a shadow moved across his frozen eyes, a gangly figure silhouetted against the bright light beaming down from above.

“You say all I gotta do is sign that there paper and we’ll be done?” He heard Joey’s voice say as his eyes somehow adjusting, bringing his buddy’s face into crystal clear focus directly above him. 

“Yes, Mr. Randall. You sign the paper and this incident just…goes away. We’ll take care of everything!” Came the voice of…Hell, what was her name? Meh, it was the Dragon Lady was talking, hissing like a snake from somewhere out of sight.

They’d been touring the factory, on their way to the customization department to build their Life-Bots. Bruce Lee and the Dragon Lady had been telling them all about the factory, how the robots were made, the history of it all, but the two rednecks hadn’t cared about that one bit. They were too busy carousing and dashing across the catwalks that hung above the factory floor.

“Man I cain’t wait t’git my hands on my bot!” Joey had laughed as the two darted around on the metal walkways, staring down at the robot assembly lines, the huge number of white suited technicians, various obstacle courses and, of course, a large stockpile of ready-to-be-shipped Life-Bots of all shapes and sizes.

“Hell don’t know why you even bothered t’come! Coulda just got you a dog!” Bobby had roared back, giving his friend a playful shove and taking off before his friend could punch him, starting a careless chase several hundred feet above the floor.

“Please sirs, don’t ru-“ Bruce Lee had said in his accented English as the two had bounded across the catwalks in their slightly alcohol fueled carousing. But Bobby was too busy looking behind him to notice the small cleaning robot trundling across the catwalk. All it took was one catch of his foot, one twist of his ankle and suddenly Bobby was falling head-first towards the factory floor, some two hundred feet below. Then it all went black.

Bobby knew he was dead, so he wasn’t surprised about sudden bright light that had filled his vision. But he hadn’t expect it to be overhead factory lights. He'd also expected a choir of angels...Not the hushed, worried voices of a bunch of strangers. He had expected to look upon the face of God and weep...But all that greeted him was the concerned face of his buddy, Joe and a bunch of Asian doctors. And he could move, all he could do was stare straight ahead while the Dragon Lady and Bruce Lee were explaining something.

"Now you understand the deal correct? We will buy you a house and will pay you five million in American dollars, and you and your Life-Bot go home and say NOTHING of this! If you do, the corporation will take legal measures against you. Do you understand!?" Bruce Lee said, his voice angry and impatient.

"Yeah, yeah, shore. Ah'll take that money. Yer gonna buy me that house I want, right? N'point in having a Life-Bot if I ain't got no big purty house to go with it!" Joe was saying, looking at Bobby with a very strange, sly look on his long face.

"Yes, Mr. Randall, we will buy the house that you agreed on with our legal team last week. Now please, if your Life-Bot is up to your standards, will you please take the check and it with you? It has been a long three months for all of us"

"Well, if she's rarin' t'go...Hey, uh, Bobbi, uh, engage or somethin'!" Joe said, and Bobby could feel his body suddenly relax. He lifted an arm and sat up, suddenly aware of all the weird symbols cluttering his vision. Since when could he read Korean?

He lifted an arm that didn’t feel or look right, marveling at how he could somehow track the direction where the packing peanuts were going to fall! Then he lifted the other arm, it’s slender, smooth perfect sliding slightly out of a pink sleeve that covered his very strange feeling torso. Then Bobby pulled his body upwards and he felt hair tingling his scalp and a couple of strange, but oddly small, weights jiggle slightly beneath the bright pink shirt.

“Aw hell, Joey, what happen-“ Bobby groaned, stopping in mid-sentence at the sound of his high, and very soft voice. He still sounded southern though. At least SOMETHING hadn’t changed.

“Shit, I don’t care for that at all. Hey, uh, Bobbi, can you talk like with an accent, or sumthin?” Joey asked with a frown.

“Yes I can. This better?” Bobby answered immediately, and not totally of his own free will. He blinked in confusion, looking down at the rest of his body. If the voice and arms had already confirmed it, Bobby was a woman! His bare legs stuck out of the bottom of his large pink shirt, and beneath, against the…emptiness where his penis used to be, was now just a slightly warm void! The redneck looked at his feet and wiggled tiny, perfect little toes. Why had...why was he...

“Hey, you done put the who inflatable tits and ass on her, right?” Joey asked, looking square at Bobby’s chest.

“Yessir, just as you requested!” Dragon Lady answered, pushing a button on a remote in her small hand. Bobby felt a strange sensation and looked down to see enormous breasts pushing against the pink shirt he was wearing! And that…the inflatable breasts…That had been something he was going to do on his Life-Bot! 

That meant...Oh no. Oh Christ on a motorcycle hitting a turd on fire, NO!

Joey must have seen the look of panic on Bobby’s face because Bobby’s best bud in the whole world (or at least the state of Alabama) suddenly yelled “Uh Life-Bot, shut down!” And Bobby’s vision immediately went dark once more.

The next time he ‘woke up’, he was yet again in a different place. Though this time it was a really, really nice house! It was massive, and was in the mountains over-looking a city he didn’t recognize as snow lightly fell from a cloudy sky! Yet just as he thought the question, a little green message popped up in the bottom corner of his vision. Current location: Home. Changwon. South Gyeongsang Province. South Korea.

“What hell!? Not know this place!” Bobby hissed in his new voice, once again caught off guard by how…soft he sounded.

“Ah, looks like yer finally awake! Turned you on like ten minutes ago! Well, guess you got some questions, better ask ‘em now. You can drop the accent fer now, but soon as we’re done I want it back, understand?” Joey’s voice crooned from somewhere behind him, "Ya'll turn that cute butt around and let's get to it!"

"Yessir!" Bobby said, and felt his body turning. His center of gravity was off, and he looked down at himself, startled to see he was now in a VERy tight fitting, flowery...dress thing that Asians wore, with breasts that looked like they were about to explode out of it! He stopped on a dime though, and stared at his best bud who was in a very expensive looking robe.

"Well, guess I'll start. You died, bud. But turns out that's how they make you Life-Bots! They take a bunch of nobodies like you were, cut out the brain after they die, and stick 'em in some kind of computer thing! Thatputs all the stuff y'need to be obedient and whatnot!" Joey said with a smug smile.

"But...Why me?" Bobby whined, ignoring the 'Designation: 순경 English: Sungyeong. Current nickname: Baby...Allwhere his name was supposed to be. where it HAD been the first time he had woken up.

Joey just grinned. "Well, hell. They offered to make YOU my Life-Bot, put me up in this house and pay for everything! Not like I'm gonna turn THAT down! 'sides, it was yer own damn fault, all that damn runnin'. Took 'em eight months to put yer brain back together, by the by"

Bobby felt the synthetic blood drain from his new face, "Eight months! Wh-what the hell!? What about the folks back home!?"

"Aw hell, everyone in that trailer park was so doped up on meth anyway. No one is gonna remember us. I done sold all our stuff anyway. Life-Bots don't own property, cuz they ARE property!"

"Joey, I...You gotta help me out here!" Bobby stuttered.

"Well, now y'know. Man, glad they finally worked out them kinks. Who after eight months livin' here that I was really into Asian chick anyhow? Anyway, Baby, why don't you go back to my little Korean sweetheart and go get me a beer, okay hun? Then later we can try out bed mode!" Joey said with a cruel chuckle as he re-arranged his robe.

Something in Bobby...Sungyeong...Baby's mind clicked. She bowed low with a heavily accented "Yes, sir" and shuffled quietly through the massive house and into the kitchen, opening the fridge and pulling out an ice-cold beer. Imported. American. She turned and shuffled queitly back to Joey, who was waiting with a enormous grin on his face.

"Goddamn now THAT is what I'm talkin' about!" The redneck whooped before taking a swig of his beer.

"I not like this. Change me back! You starting to p..pee-uss...You making me mad! I kill you!" Baby said with as much force as she could muster, managing to raise a single fist towards Joey.

"Woah! Woah there honey! Why don't you just forget all about that stuff that happened to smelly ol'Bobby? My Baby don't need any of that, she just needs to be my sexy little Life-Bot!"

Baby wanted to scream as the words "DELETING FILES" appeared in front of her eyes...