Lancaster Teaser

Still writing. Also dealing with real life stuff. Family issues, moving, all that. Figure I should show you guys some progress.

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Ruby Rose was a woman of many talents. At 24 years old, she saved the world from a genocidal immortal witch, stopped a crazy bitch who wanted magic powers (then got those powers herself, details), and then finally punished the gods who started this whole dang mess (but not before making them fix everything and delete all the Grimm from existence). All before she was old enough to drink. Not bad for someone who flunked Dr. Oobleck's history class.

She also ended up marrying the best man on Remnant. Jaune. Just thinking about him made her chest tingle in that funny way even though they'd been married for almost two years now. Yang joked that the two of them were in the perpetual honeymoon phase, though they she didn't really have room to talk considering the three-way thing she had with Blake and Weiss (and wasn't that a surprise!). As far as Ruby considered it, they deserved this happy ending.

So yeah, not to toot her own horn or anything, but it wasn't a lie to say she had it all. Looks, brains, and skills. Especially engineering skills. Most Huntsmen knew how to build (or at least maintain) weapons, but Ruby was a savant. She was tinkering with weapons as soon as she could walk and made her first makeshift firearm - a tube shotgun she called Little Stubby - when she was seven. Dad screamed so bad when she used it to shoot out a window...

Even Crescent Rose, her (first) baby, was a work of art she made when she was still in Signal. She improved it over the years, of course, but the baseline was pure prodigy ingenuinty. No blueprints or stealing ideas from anyone else, just her own hard work. She'd worked on weapons, vehicles, engines, and just about anything she could get her hands on. Engineering was the love of her life (next to Jaune and her friends), and she could disassemble an Atlas gunship while she was blindfolded.

...

So why the heck was this so damn hard?!

Ruby glared hatefully at the instruction manual and the scattered parts on the floor. Ruby had faced Salem, Cinder, Tyrian, and the that really annoying woman in the HOA (screw you, Helen!). But nothing - and she meant nothing - earned her undying hatred more than IKEA.

It was supposed to be simple! The parts were all set, the instructions were clear, and even a five year old could do it! But here she was. Ruby Rose, world savior and engineer extraordinaire, completely failing to make a crib with the instructions right there.

This wasn't supposed to be complicated! She could repair mechashift rifles in her sleep, she helped repair Amity arena after it crashed, but a crib? Apparently, it was impossible! This was supposed to be a surprise for Jaune. They just got the positive pregnancy test and they were over the moon. Jaune spent the past week practically fist pumping - another reason she was so in love with him. She even told him by telling to get something from the oven. The look of realization on his face when she he saw the single bun still made her chest warm.

A feeling that was immediately replaced by just how pissed off she was right now!

Ruby growled and looked over the instructions again. Then back to the...thing she made. It was supposed to be a crib. It ended up looking like some kind of wooden abomination that would've given Salem nightmares. It was taller than she was and had wings! Wings! She wasn't even sure where those extra parts came from cause she didn't make them and they definitely weren't in the original packaging. Feels like Salem was spiting her from beyond her seal.

She sighed and dismantled the whole thing. Again. This was the dozenth time she'd done this and she was ten seconds away from blowing up her house with a firestorm. Think of the baby, she told herself as she set the pieces back down. And Jaune too. He'd be so disappointed if she blew up their house. Again. In her defense, Maiden powers were really annoying to deal with, especially since Ozpin was gone and wasn't around to teach her.