Say Xiao Long to being Single (NSFW Dragonslayer drunken marriage story) - Chapter 1

New commission. This one is a NSFW drunken dragonslayer marriage story. I'm sure you've seen its type before, but I hope you enjoy it regardless :)

For anyone interested in making a commission, email me at: storylover543@gmail.com

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His head hurt.

That was the thought that ran through Jaune's mind as he slowly came to consciousness. The leader of team JNPR opened his eyes and hissed as the bright light of the morning sun burned his eyes. His eyelids slammed shut on instinct and he curled onto the right side of the bed in the vain hope of trying to go back to blissful oblivion. He wrapped his arms around the warm and surprisingly fluffy pillow. Mmh, so soft and comforting...

"Mmm~"

...

That wasn't a pillow.

Jaune's eyes shot open, inviting another wave of agony through his skill which he forced himself to ignore. He sat up on the bed and the blanket fell down to his waist, exposing his bare chest to the cold open air of what looked like a motel room. He ignored all that and looked down to the left side of the bed.

His heart leaped up to his throat at the sight of a very naked Yang Xiao Long sleeping on the bed. Her arms and legs were splayed about, taking up way more space on the double bed than necessary, and her mouth was ajar with a trail of drool falling across her right cheek. His fellow blonde didn't look graceful in the least, but that hardly mattered considering the situation he was in. The only thing he could focus on was something else entirely.

Boobs. Breasts. Nipples. Tits, if you wanted to be crude about it. The blanket had fallen enough that Yang's bountiful, boisterous bosoms were bare for all the world to see. She was still covered up from the waist down, but he didn't doubt that she was exposed down there too. The urge to pull the blanket down and confirm for himself was overwhelming, but he managed to hold himself back. Mama Arc didn't raise a brute.

Jaune took a deep breath and raised the blanket covering his lower half. Maybe he was still-

Nope, he was naked too.

The blonde knight looked down at his exposed crotch. His flaccid dick was covered in clear, dried fluid and he wasn't stupid enough to think that was water. He let out a soft groan and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, both hands pressed against his face. What the hell happened last night? He remembered them drinking in Vale to celebrate their second year at Beacon. Even Ruby had come along, though Yang had expressly forbidden her from drinking anything but mocktails.

He tried to remember what happened the night before. The eight of them were drinking at a nice bar that Yang knew. It was a classy place, something even Weiss approved of. The drinks were pretty good too. Strong, and that was coming from him. He might've...overindulged a bit, but it wasn't like they had too much to worry about. There wasn't any school the next day and Vale was filled with affordable motels. Perfect place to nurse off a hangover.

He remembered all of them really getting into it with Ruby pouting the whole time about being left out. He would've snuck her a glass, but he knew Yang was strict about it (despite her own bad habits). They'd drank well into the night, but details of what happened between that and just him and Yang stumbling onto the motel room were blurry. All he recalled was a lot of talking and what sounded like clapping for some reason.

And then...

Jaune looked down and gulped at the sight that greeted him. Here he was, sitting on a bed with his legs spread with Yang Xiao Long kneeling between them. She looked up at him with a twinkle in her lilac eyes and stuck her tongue out mischievously, "Is this for me?" She reached out and gently grabbed hold of his erect cock. Jaune bit his lip to keep from moaning and Yang's lips curled up in a smug smirk. She knew exactly the effect she had on him and relished it.

"Damn, VB, why do you even need that sword of yours if you're already packing this much heat." Of course, she'd make a joke right now. What else did he expect? "If I knew you were packing this much heat, I would've done this sooner."

He was about to try and make a quip back when she suddenly wrapped her tits around his hard, aching prick. Jaune couldn't hold back a groan as the pillowy soft mounds of flesh almost engulfed his rod. Yang had one of the best figures in Beacon, a fact that she was unashamedly proud of. Talk about how it'd feel like to feel her tits in their hands or wrapped around their dick was a common topic in the locker room. Not for nothing that she was considered one of the hottest girls in school.

And now she was on her knees giving him a boobjob.

"Ooh, someone's excited," Yang chuckled softly, "Alright now, let's have some fun. Don't shoot out too quick now."

Jaune shook his head and winced at the sight of his cock already growing hard again. Now was not the time to get lost in his fantasies. He pressed a hand against his forehead and groaned, trying to ignore the pulsing pain in his temples. He wasn't a stranger to hangovers. Coming from a family of winemakers, he was used to drinking from a young age. The minimum age to drink was a lot less strict outside the walls too. He'd been drinking since he turned 15.

"Mgh~"

Jaune froze and couldn't will himself to turn around as Yang woke up too. He heard the sounds of rustling sheets, which were quickly followed by a few soft groans that made him more nervous than he wanted to admit. The continued pulsing in his temples didn't help matters in the least.

He kept facing ahead as Yang slowly sat up and stretched her arms above her head. He could practically see the way her prodigious chest bounced and tried not to imagine her pert, pink nipples pressed against his back...or wrapped around his co-

"VB, that you?" Yang asked with a yawn, thankfully jutting him out of his thoughts.

"Ah...y-yeah."

"Stupid question. You're the only blonde I know." She yawned again, "What time is it?"

"Uh...dunno. I didn't check." Their clothes were strewn in a pile on the floor nearby. Their scrolls were probably there too.

His plan to keep looking away like a gentleman was foiled when she moved and sat next to him, "Too much to hope you've got some hair of the dog?" Yang mumbled, not at all caring that she was exposing everything to him. His eyes flicked down to her toned, muscular body and he gulped. Huntresses were some of the most beautiful women on Remnant, but Yang was a cut above the rest. Strong muscles and a marble-like physique that did nothing to detract from her looks. On the contrary, it only made her look more attractive. Many Huntsmen and Huntresses relied on Aura to carry them rather than training their bodies past their limits.

Fuck, how the hell did he manage to sleep with her last night?

"Yo, VB? You alright?" Yang snapped her fingers in front of his face.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He shook his head, "Just...maybe you should get dressed?"

"Huh?" She looked down at her naked body as if it was the first time she noticed. Her eyes widened and she she covered her breasts with both arms, "D-Don't look! Pervert!" She turned away and screamed, exposing her ass to him in the movement.

"I-m not! I'm sorry! I'll just-"

"Pfft!" Yang laughed and turned to face him again, a bright grin on her face, "Oh my gods, you should see the look on your face!" She fell back on the bed and laughed harder, legs kicking and hands atop her toned stomach, "D-Did you seriously think I was gonna go 'kyaaa~' like some Mistralian manga character?"

"H-Hey..." Jaune blushed, though he couldn't stop himself from laughing just a bit under his breath. The fact that she was treating it so lightly helped calm him down.

"It's no big deal, dude. We fucked last night. We both got drunk and what happened, happened. It's not my first rodeo." She sat up again and stretched her arms above her head, "Look, I know it's a big deal for you, first time and all, but-"

"Hey, no, wait." Jaune cut her off, "I've had sex before."

"Uh-huh," Yang said. She clearly didn't believe him.

"No, really!" It was...well, prom night." He winced. It wasn't a good memory. He'd been 16 at the time, and Jade was one of the prettier girls in town. Nothing compared to a Huntress or someone from the big city, but in their small town, she stuck out. All dark hair and green eyes with a snarky sense of humor. He thought he was the luckiest bastard in Domremy when the two of them got handsy in the gym storage room. Especially when she called him the next day and said she was open to repeating the performance, which he happily took her up on.

He'd been over the moon...till he realized that she wasn't interested in a relationship. Maybe it was his fault. He just assumed they'd get together even though there wasn't really anything there. He should've noticed when she seemed uninterested whenever he tried to make plans to go on dates or to introduce her to his family.

"Whatever you say." Yang rolled her eyes playfully. Jaune sighed and didn't bother to argue anymore. It wasn't a fight worth picking, "So...mind if I take a shower first?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sure."

"Thanks." She winked and, after standing up, smacked her ass. The firm buns jiggled slightly and Jaune stared. What? She clearly wasn't ashamed of it! Yang gave him one last grin before she strutted to the bathroom.

Man, the guys at Beacon would've been so jealous if they knew...

The sounds of the shower running came soon after followed by Yang's singing. She...wasn't very good. Jaune winced as the off-key tunes echoed around the room. Yang might've been talented in a lot of things, but singing definitely wasn't one of them.

"Mmh." Jaune stood up and tried to ignore the stiffness in his joints. How was he going to explain this to the rest of his team? Ren would be a bro about it, but he was sure Pyrrha and Nora would pry. And Ruby...oh gods, he'd fucked her sister. Granted, neither he nor Yang were virgins, but how was he supposed to look his best friend in the eye after that? He must've been broken some kind of code doing what he did.

He brought the back of his left hand across his forehead and stopped. Something felt...off. Jaune raised his hand to eye level and blinked at the sight of a silver band on his left ring finger. That...no, couldn't be. It must've just been some cheap thing he bought last night on a laugh. There was no chance that-

Yang suddenly stopped singing. The unexpected pause felt heavy for reasons he couldn't quite explain, and it only got worse when Yang suddenly asked in an eerily calm tone, "So...weird question, but do you have a ring on your left hand?"

"Yeah...?"

"Oh..." Another heavy pause, "...Do you remember what we did last night? Before we got here, I mean."

"Uh...no. Hold on, lemme check my scroll." He put on some underwear and rummaged through the pile. He found it and, ignoring how oddly sticky it felt, tapped the screen. His brows furrowed when he saw a paused video with him and Yang in front of what looked like...was that headmaster Ozpin?

He tapped the screen again.

"Do you, Jaune Florentius Arc, take Yang Xiao Long to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I dooooo!" Jaune said.

"And do you, Yang Xiao-"

That was as far as the priest - Ozpin - got before Yang grabbed him by the collar and pulled him in for a rough, sensual kiss. The two had started making out on the altar just before the camera tilted to Ruby's bright, smiling face, "Congrats, you guys! I'm so happy for you both! Oh, this is going to be so-"

Jaune stopped the video.

...

"Yang?" He called out.

"Yeah...?"

"...I think we're married."

"Oh."

...

Their screams could be heard all across Vale.

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Married. He was married to Yang.

That was the only thought that ran through his head as he and Yang - his wife - silently sat together on the bullhead back to Beacon. The throbbing pain in his temples only got worse as the thought kept repeating. He was married to Yang. He still couldn't believe it, but the proof was right there on his finger (and scroll). They'd tried to remove the rings, of course, but the damn things wouldn't budge. It was clamped down harder than an Ursa trap.

They were minutes away from landing in Beacon when Yang finally spoke, "So..."

"So..."

Yang sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, "Look, V- Jaune. Last night? It didn't happen. We had some fun, and that's all that we did."

"Totally agreed." Jaune nodded eagerly. It wasn't like he was against being married to Yang, but not right now. Not so soon. For Brothers' sake, the two of them had only turned 18 a few months ago! He had a few years of being a Huntsman left before he even considered the idea of settling down, "But what do we do about..." He gestured to the ring on his left hand, "And at least Ruby knows about it. She was the one who recorded the whole thing on my scroll." And knowing his luck, everyone else on their teams did.

"We'll deal with it when it happens," Yang said firmly. Her tone left no room for argument, "Just...we'll go get something to eat so we don't look half dead then we'll head up to the headmaster's office and explain that we were blind drunk and should not be married." The last words were said like a command. He had to admit, he was impressed by her guts. Most people wouldn't try to throw their weight around when talking to an immortal wizard who'd been alive longer than their whole team combined.

"Do you really think it'll be that easy?" Jaune asked.

"Why would he argue?" Yang asked back, "We were obviously drunk off our asses and we've been married for less than a day. Getting rid of this is gonna be a piece of cake."

"I hope you're right..."

"Agh, stop worrying so much!" Yang slapped his back. Jaune slumped forward and winced at the force of the blow, "Shit, sorry."

"It's fine." Jaune forced a smile and a thumbs up.

The bullhead landed soon after and the two of them walked down the ramp. Despite having been here just yesterday, coming back to Beacon felt...different somehow. A part of him whispered that it was because he was a married man, but he quickly shut it up. He wasn't married, not really. This was just one of those Vacuo weddings. All they had to do was explain the situation and then they could all look back on it years later as a funny memory.

But first, they needed something to eat. They were starving.

The two of them entered the cafeteria only to be bombarded with shouts, "CONGRATULATIONS!" A multitude of voices screamed. Jaune was nearly blown back by how loud it was, and when he looked back his heart sank to the pit of his stomach. The rest of their team was there, all congratulatory smiles and well-wishes. But that wasn't the worst part. No, that was the cake they had propped up at the central table along with decorations congratulating them on their happy marriage.

Jaune opened his mouth but nothing came. How was he supposed to say anything to this? To his right, Yang looked equally flabbergasted. For the first time he knew her, the boisterous bruiser of team RWBY was completely stunned and silent as Ruby grabbed her by the hands and dragged her to the table. Jaune too was pushed by Nora, who was grinning from ear to ear and babbling about how excited she was about last night's wedding.

The two were forced to sit down side by side while Ruby cut the cake. Her bright smile was blinding, "Congrats!" she said again, handing the two of them generous slices of cake, "We wanted to celebrate last night, but you two were so excited about the honeymoon!" Both of them winced. Yeah, the 'honeymoon'... "It's a shame Dad and Uncle Qrow couldn't make it, but it was super spontaneous and all. By the way, Dad wants to talk to you two later. He wants to congratulate you both!"

Yang looked utterly horrified, though if Ruby noticed, she didn't say anything. Jaune was about to ask why she looked so scared when Weiss cut in, "I must give my congratulations as well," Weiss said primly, mouth curled up in a small smile, "I didn't expect the two of you would be joined together in holy matrimony, but I can't deny how happy the two of you were last night." She turned to Jaune and her eyes became half-lidded, "And of course, I assume this means the end of your flirtations with me, Jaune. After all, you're now a married man. It wouldn't be proper."

"R-Right..." Jaune shivered at the understated menace in her tone.

"Last night was so much fun!" Nora cheered, hands against his shoulders as she jumped up in excitement, "Remember when the White Fang busted in? Or when Jaune went shirtless and had a fistfight with that big guy with the chainsaw?" No, he didn't remember any of that! "Oh man, the whole thing was so awesome!"

"I have to admit, Yang proposing right in the middle of the fight was a surprise." Ren hummed.

"Ugh..." Yang groaned and covered her face with both hands.

"It was...romantic." Blake, of all people, said. The slight blush on her face didn't make him feel good, "I'm surprised at how...heated the two of you got. It was like something straight out of the Sais of Love. Especially when you-"

"I really don't wanna know, Blake," Yang cut her off.

"My guy bestie and my big sis. This is so great." Ruby smiled dreamily. Jaune felt like he was being stabbed in the heart.

"Yes...we're all so happy for you," Pyrrha said last. Her eyes were closed and she smiled widely, but there was something...off about it that he couldn't explain. ...Ah, she was probably still nursing a hangover like he was. How the rest (sans Ruby, who didn't drink) weren't laid up was beyond him.

The pressure from the rest of their friends was enough to keep them quiet about their plans for divorce. He didn't think they'd take it so...sincerely. What the hell happened last night? Everything between drinking at the bar and the 'honeymoon' was a blur. At best, he could recall faint images. And yes, those did involve having a shirtless fistfight with a giant who talked about how he wanted to kill a Schnee. Weird.

And so with their friends' well-wishes, the two were forced to smile along, eat cake, and act like everything was right with the world. But it wasn't, of course. Yang's sideways glances made it clear that they were gonna head to Ozpin's office as soon as they could. Jaune subtly nodded and tried not to feel guilty as Ruby gushed about how they should really hang out more 'as a family' and Weiss offered to plan a 'proper wedding' for them along with recommendations on where to buy a good suit and wedding dress.

It took them over an hour to finally get away from them all. They made their way to the elevator and Yang slumped against the wall as soon as the doors closed, "Ugh...that sucked." She groaned.

"Ruby was really happy..."

"And so was Weiss. Ugh, shoulda known she'd be the kind of girl who micromanages weddings." Yang sighed and stood up straight, "Well, whatever. We'll talk to Ozpin and then deal with whatever happens later. Honestly, the two of us were fucking wasted last night. Why's everyone acting like this is normal?"

"You're asking me? I've only been training as a Huntsman for a year. I figured all of you guys were just weird."

"Excuse you?" Yang scoffed and crossed her arms, "I wasn't the one who got into a shirtless fistfight last night."

"Well, I wasn't the one who proposed marriage."

The two of them got quiet after that. It seemed like it was both their faults, though neither wanted to admit it. Instead, they silently walked to the headmaster's office once the elevator doors opened. Yang knocked twice, "Come in," the headmaster's voice came through the speaker above them.

They went inside and found Ozpin staring out the window with his back toward them. He was always like that. Jaune wondered if he ever actually sat at his desk, "Good morning, Mr. Arc, Ms. Xiao Long. To what do I owe the visit?" He still didn't turn around. There was a reason people thought that he had eyes at the back of his head.

"Yeah, hey." Yang shifted from one foot to another. The other blonde was uncharacteristically nervous, "So...you got us married last night?"

"Yes. I am an ordained minister and can officiate marriages." He took a long, slow sip of his cup of hot chocolate, "You two were quite boisterous the night prior, though it's not my first time dealing with such things in my long life."

"Yeah, about that..." Yang took a deep breath, "You...mind annulling that marriage?"

"And why would I do that?" Ozpin turned around and raised a brow at them. He felt like history was being made.

"Well...we were drunk," Jaune said lamely. When Ozpin didn't reply, he continued, "I don't really remember much about what happened last night, and that's kind of a good reason to say that this marriage is, well..." Jaune trailed off.

"I see." Another sip. The noise felt like nails against a chalkboard, "Well, I am dutybound to inform you that a state of intoxication is not a viable basis for annulment. You are both legal adults and neither one of you was forced to partake in alcohol without your consent, yes?"

"I mean, no, we weren't forced into it-"

'Then there is nothing further to discuss about an annulment," Ozpin said, cutting Yang off, "Annulment can be done in a scant few cases, though most reasons being forced to undergo the marriage under duress. Seeing as neither of you was forced, and chose to partake in alcohol of your own free will, the marriage stands."

"That's bullshit!" Yang screamed. Her eyes briefly turned red, though Ozpin's raised brow turned them back to their usual lilac shade, "We were drunk off our ass! How is this binding?"

"The same way a drunken driver would still be held responsible for his actions once he was sober again. You are both adults and aware of the effects of alcohol. The consequences that come from partaking are on your shoulders." Another sip, "And regardless of your state, you were both cognizant enough to sign the marriage certificate after the ceremony was finished. If you wish to end your marriage, then it will have to be a divorce, not an annulment."

Both husband and wife (ugh) winced at the headmaster's unsympathetic words. Vale had always been a bit more...strict when it came to marriage. It was pretty easy to get into one, but getting out was like pulling teeth. A divorce...the thought of being an 18-year-old divorcee made him cringe, but it was better than the alternative, right? At least this way they'd get the chance to actually be single before they graduated Beacon.

"Alright...so we're filing for a divorce," Jaune said. Yang nodded firmly after.

"Hm, that's your decision." Ozpin set his mug down on the table, "You'll have to file it in the courthouse down in Vale. Who will be the one filing for the divorce?"

Jaune looked at Yang and the other blonde shrugged, "Uh...me, I guess?" he said.

"Very well. I'll call an associate to get you both a meeting." Huh, that was nice of him. Ozpin pulled out a form from his desk and slid it across the rich mahogany "Mr. Arc, please sign this waiver which states that you agree that half of every weekly stipend you receive will be given to Ms. Xiao Long for the foreseeable future."

...

"Wait, what?" Jaune blinked, trying to process the words. Yang looked just as confused as him.

"You're filing for a divorce, correct?" He nodded, "Well, as the one filing for a divorce, you must justify why you're doing such. Abuse and cheating are the most common reasons. Without justification, a divorce can still be filed, but the one filing it will have to give up half of their paychecks for alimony for the next twenty years. Seeing as you're still a student, your weekly stipend will have to suffice. Any future payments you receive from Huntsman contracts will replace it when the time comes. Now, if you ple-"

"I'm not signing that!" Jaune screamed. Yang looked like she wanted to protest, but she kept quiet. It wasn't like she was jumping at the chance to give up half her money too.

"I see." Ozpin nodded, "Well then, I hope you two have a long and fruitful marriage."

"This is bullshit!" Yang screamed again, throwing her hands up, "So we can't get divorced unless we give up half our lien or prove that the other person's a cheating bastard?! Who the fuck made up these rules?!"

"A very wise man who understood that there needed to be strict laws to ensure that certain witches can't take you to divorce court and gain full custody of your children with trumped up charges. And then said witch decides to make her own kingdom in the Evernight to gloat about how much people prefer to serve under her rather than live in a land that isn't a blacked-out hellscape." A pause, "Yes, a very wise man indeed. Now people can't just divorce their partners with no consequence without ironclad proof."

"So...we're getting fucked over cause you hate Queen Sal-"

"Don't say her name in this office!" Ozpin slammed his hand on the table. Yang jumped up in shock, question forgotten, "Now, if neither of you are going to sign this form, then please leave and stop wasting my time." His next words were eerily calm, "As a married couple, you are entitled to your own shared room alongside your standard living spaces. Your keycards should already be keyed into it and the room is Number 357. It's right next to team RWBY's."

"But-"

"Please leave."

There was nothing else they could do but walk away in defeat. It wasn't a secret to anyone that Ozpin was an immortal with a grudge against Queen Salem, but they didn't think they would get caught in the crossfire. They walked back to their rooms on autopilot and simultaneously cringed when they saw their new room. There was a 'newly married' sign out front along with a heart symbol. Jaune didn't even want to know if that was Beacon standard or if someone on their teams did that.

"...Wanna check it out?" Yang asked.

"Might as well." Jaune sighed.

The room was...nice. Spacious, especially since it was only the two of them, though the double bed didn't exactly make him feel better. Yang raided the minifridge while Jaune looked around. This was supposed to be their room - their lovenest, the annoying voice at the back of his head said - as a married couple. The fact that Beacon could prepare this so quickly made him wonder just how often students getting married happened.

Jaune sat down on the bed and Yang joined him soon after. Neither one of them said a word for a couple of minutes before Jaune asked, "So...now what?"

"Hell if I know." Yang brought a hand through her hair, lips puckered in a deep frown, "All I do know is that I'm not staying married. Fuck that."

"But what are we supposed to do? The person asking for divorce loses half their money for the next two decades!"

"Hm...I've got an idea." Jaune's brows furrowed at Yang's sudden grin. That was never a good sign, "Alright, so this is what we're gonna do. You ask for the divorce- lemme finish." She held up a hand to stop his protests, "You ask for the divorce, and when they give me half of your stipend or paycheck, I'll just give it back to you. There's no law saying I have to spend it on myself, right? We game the system and neither of us loses anything. Win-win!"

It sounded good in theory, but Jaune had his doubts. Sure, she could pass him back the lien she got paid, but would she do that for the next twenty years? Yang said she planned to explore Remnant once she graduated. What if she just lost track of time or forgot? What if she decided that she didn't wanna give back free money and spend it on a little something for herself? It made him feel bad not trusting her, but Jaune wasn't the gullible schmuck he was a year ago.

"...Counter offer," he said, "You file for the divorce and I'll give you back the money I get. Sounds good?"

Yang's smile faded and she narrowed her eyes at him, "You saying you don't trust me?"

"I could ask the same thing." Jaune said, matching her gaze, "It's your plan. I'm just suggesting we switch things up a bit."

"...Not gonna happen."

"You know, this really doesn't give me a lot of trust."

"Come on!" Yang huffed, "I'll give you back the money if you just file for the divorce! Promise!"

"Then you do it! I promise the same thing, and an Arc never goes back on his word!"

"Yeah, I saw you lie when you said you wouldn't serenade Weiss if she opened the door. I'm calling bullshit."

"Th-That's different!" Jaune blushed. He really was an idiot back then.

"Suuuure." Yang rolled her eyes, "So...not gonna go with my plan?'

"No."

"...Then I guess we're stuck." Yang glared at him. Jaune glared back, even though he was sure that Yang could still kick his ass, "I'm not losing half my money till I'm middle-aged, but I'm not staying in this marriage either."

"Yeah, same here."

The two of them looked at one another for another moment before they broke their gaze. Neither of them said it out loud, but they both knew what their plan was now. Find proof that the other wasn't fit to be a good partner then file for the divorce. Already, the two were brewing schemes. Yang needed to talk to Weiss and Jaune was making plans to go down to Vale and find that Junior guy that Yang fought with before she got to Beacon.

"...Last chance, Jaune."

"I'm not filing for the divorce, Yang."

"Fine." Yang stood and crossed her arms, "Then I guess you should get ready to lose half your paychecks." She walked out of the room, leaving Jaune to lie down on the bed and look up at the ceiling. This really wasn't how he thought this day would go.

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Jaune and Yang are not so happily married because Ozpin is a bitter bastard about losing custody of his kids. Oof. Now they're gonna try to find a way out of the marriage and slowly realize that they may not want out as much as they claim.

And yes, there will be smut too. They are married and cheating will screw them over, so...

Question:

1. Crack question, but if you were in Jaune's place, would you have agreed to Yang's plan of gaming the system? Would you trust her to give half the money back after twenty years?