Once Ever After Trailer v2

i think this trailer does a much better job conveying what the game is offering

androidK

Thanks for providing feedback. There will be another draft of this concept... sometime.

Sierra Lee

I agree with the others so far, this seems like a great direction for the trailer. It definitely implies the presence of sexual content, but it definitely sells the idea that this is a game which stands out for being clever and original, and not just by the standards of HRPGs. The pace of the text could probably use fine-tuning, but as another fast reader, I don't think I can offer particularly useful feedback there.

Desertopa

Thanks for providing feedback, especially on the text.

Sierra Lee

This was great! I think this works extremely well. I'm excited to see your finished product here. I'll leave it there since you know you have more work to do and others have left some good feedback already. Regarding your specific question on how long the text was on screen for, I read fairly quickly but didn't feel like the text crawled too slowly for me personally. However, I had my wife take a look at it because she reads significantly slower than I do. She only watched it once but she was not able to read everything, especially when certain words changed and required her to reread stuff to make sense of it. Anyway, I think this is definitely a step in the right direction. Good luck with getting this trailer across the finishing line!

Grim8P

Thanks for your feedback. This (or at least everything through Ulfina) is indeed going to be the beginning of the trailer, so hopefully it functions that way.

Sierra Lee

Thanks for your feedback. I'm glad this one intrigued you.

Sierra Lee

This is much better. It gets the premise across straight away, as well as injecting a bit of seriousness and humour along with the hints at the sexual content. This little sequence would work quite well on its own as a teaser, which is good considering you said that most viewers don't get past the first 30 seconds or so of trailers on Steam, IIRC. When combined with the other details to give people a feel of the gameplay and content, I think that will work well.

Lamsey

I haven't played OEA at all and have honestly mostly only skimmed most of the patreon announcements about it up to now (I've been very absorbed by TLS, but figured I'd check it out eventually), but I really liked this. I knew from previous posts that there were a lot of different tales and worlds kind of going on, but didn't really know a whole lot beyond that, but I found this really interesting and made me want to play! :) As far as word speed goes, I'm a pretty fast reader; I felt like there was enough time to fully read and process what was changing, but it was close to the edge of not enough. Either way, I like the concept!

Chimaker

Thank you for the feedback. "Better" isn't necessarily "good", so do you have any suggestions or comments on the plan before we try to proceed? Question is to everyone.

Sierra Lee

Better. That was just mysterious enough to wonder what the game is like.

Runcible Technician

Awesome!

Well this time the trailer give me some type of mistery, I like it XD

BleBle

In the immortal words of Dash Incredible, "That was Awesome!" I loved it.

Darthjake

Thanks for providing feedback, especially on pauses. The trailer would be much more symmetrical with Estra, and I'd prefer three for that part, but I wasn't sure what her text should be. I feel it would either seem anticlimactic or be lying. Wish I had another Wolf, but none of them have full bust art.

Sierra Lee

Thanks for providing feedback. The final words are indeed supposed to come at the end, after the other thirds I mentioned.

Sierra Lee

Thanks for providing feedback. I felt like the digital/glitch effect wasn't fully appropriate, but the alternatives like flame transitions felt worse. The idea of an erasing noise is a very interesting one, though, we might go with that.

Sierra Lee

This does a great job of quickly communicating the Little Red Riding Hood multiverse concept. I would suggest leaving the text on screen after the changes a tad longer. I had just enough time to read them, but I'm not sure I would have fully absorbed what it was saying if I wasn't already familiar with the characters. You might also want to add Estra, even though she's a relatively minor character. Just so that you can have three wolves, for symmetry with the three girls.

Trisk

Digging it. It's a hard premise to set up in a short teaser, but this accomplishes that solidly. Had no problems reading the text in time, but I'm a relatively fast reader. Felt like there was a bit of a thematical "cut-off" from the Ulfina to "infinite hoods, infinite wolves" section, like it's 2 different trailers, though that should be easily fixed with the right music. In general, would mostly just recommend that the trailer music binds the different sections of the trailer together, if that makes sense

DankPotatoes

I really really love it! Seriously I don't think I could imagine a better kind of tease for the game to bring players in. Even if the music is placeholder I really like the idea of it changing as well for each character. If I had to put in any feedback that wasn't just "Love it" I'd say that the "digital" sound effect whenever something changed seemed out of place given the pure fantasy of the game itself. I think maybe some sort of 'erasing' or 'crossing out' noise might fit better. It could even work as something for Evil Ingrid. Her character introduction could just be a just of scrambled red text and the word "KILL" over and over again, with the Dreamer rapidly trying to erase and black out her story, then finally flipping to the wolves to get away from here. But anyway bottom line is I adore the concept and the execution of the trailer itself as is and thing it is a fine start to a great trailer!

WaxerRed