Fate In time
Added 2019-01-08 08:13:15 +0000 UTCThe plot I had going for fate in time was something that revolved around the eventual conclusion at the battle of Camlann, and although I had more plans around this topic, it clearly isn't the way to go with how reviews are going.
The question now comes to if it's better to continue with the current plot, or go back the past few chapters and revise a different route?
Any opinions would help
Comments
Fate in time is definitely one of my favorite fanfics of all time and thank you very much for all of your effort and creativity. I was expecting and looking forward to a kingdom building story with shirou and arturia at the center and am always excited to new chapters. Not sure about the whole amnesia thing especially if they were tracked by a famililar since shirou should have been able to "smell" the magic and that separates arturia for the foundation establishment of Camelot. Was also never too mucb of a fan of mordred especially since i have always been a fan of happy endings. Like other people have mentioned, with the whole amnesia plot device, it brings preconceptions to my mind of what will likely happen which I do not want at all. I am ok with the current direction with the hope that my preconceptions of the direction of the story are proven wrong and i am enjoyingly surprised by your creativity again. In the end you are the creator of this fanfic and i will likely still enjoy the story tbough i will obviously have my strong preferences as what type of story it should be. Happy end for shirou and arturia for the win!
Kai
2019-01-09 02:48:01 +0000 UTCThe fluff is basically why I started reading the story. I just wanted to see how Shiro flirted and had sweet moments with the beautiful king. Plot honestly took a back burner to fluff. Once it went plot well... it was okay but repeated itself a lot. Some crap happens, shiro does a big move, like 5 perspectives of shiro being powerful and heroic. Tbh all I wanted was fluff with a side of predictable shiro stomping everyone in the world then marrying and fluffing happily ever after. Maybe some cute kids idk, mordred can be shiros kid for all I care.
Shelwyn
2019-01-09 00:38:52 +0000 UTCNot every chapter is gonna be as exciting as people hope. That’s normal. People might claim overuse of amnesia, but you do it well since it builds on what shapes up to be a good plot line. People might say the story becomes predictable, but honestly, one or two chapters and you’ll have us excitedly going crazy as you bring in something else. You’ve done it before. Keep going.
G1Splicer
2019-01-09 00:31:35 +0000 UTCI have to say that this has been one of if not the top story on my list of following and now I just don't feel so excited about it. Many times I have gone back and reread chapters waiting for the next and enjoying it immensely. After this last turn of events it has left me disheartened. It is your story to write as you want but this has left many of us quite jarred and saddened with the direction it is now taking. The fact of Shirou going back and what differences it would cause to the canon and how Arturia is changed was a huge draw. The point of this story not being a run of the mill canon story is what drew many of us in and now it feels like it is running into it out of nowhere. Personally I think the use of amnesiac characters throwing drama into stories and especially into the relationships a very overused plot device. I do not plan to stop reading over this but the excitement is not nearly as intense.
Matthew Rayle
2019-01-08 22:53:47 +0000 UTCHmm... personally, I have mixed feelings on current direction of the story. When I first started reading this story, I had the impression that it would be a kingdom building story, where Shirou and Arturia built the Round Table and Camelot together. When the amnesia bit happened, I didn't care too much for it until I noticed it was a parallel to Siegfriend's story. The same mixed feelings applies to Mordred and Shirou's interactions. I did not like how it implied there will be a love triangle in the future, but I loved the teasing and interactions between the too, as well as the depiction of Mordred's loneliness. In my opinion, a minor rewrite would be good, and I do have some suggestions if you are interested.
Kovaras
2019-01-08 18:04:00 +0000 UTCCan't help but agree with the others. While there is potential in making the story follow mordred path and her actions, it's almost like reading a series that goes and chamge authors halfway through. The way you've been building things, setting things up for the plot to go in a different road than thay of the original timeline and all that would entail, having the story just go and railroad itself so forcefully... It really feel like you're limiting its the potentialnwhere the story can go. I'm atill interested in seeing where you are going with all this and the road to get there, but it does make me a bit less interested than i originally was to read it.
HatofBacon
2019-01-08 16:13:41 +0000 UTCI honestly could not predict where the fic was going before, because all previous chapters indicated that you were going to do something new, like have Shirou and Arturia rule togeather, and that was exciting. But with your twist, it has railroaded the plot and killed most of the excitement I had. Finally, the separation plot point is the kind of frustration that makes me want completely ignore what you are writing until they are reunited, and then pretend those chapters didn’t happen. So now this fic is in a no win situation for me because there is nothing that I originally enjoyed left, and what you are currently writing actively makes me angry and frustrated in a bad way. It doesn’t have to be constant triumphs in this story, but Shirou’s unwavering love and support for Arturia alone and the originality of the plot should remain, and this twist tears both of those apart in a way that feels cheap. You are a better writer than this.
Googl7
2019-01-08 15:53:26 +0000 UTCPersonally I don’t have that much of a problem with the whole amnesia arc thing that’s currently going on. I just don’t really like the whole ShirouxMordred, it’s kind of jarring to see and creates a whole bunch of unnecessary future drama. At its core, FIT is a love story between Shirou and Arturia, so personally I rather not have the story suffer with a weird mother daughter love triangle. Please keep up the good work.
liteningtea
2019-01-08 15:33:07 +0000 UTC(Continuing from previous comment because I pressed the wrong button) Or, far worse, Shirou will somehow stumble his way into a harem, which is absolutely not what I started reading this for.
Googl7
2019-01-08 15:28:31 +0000 UTCI think the fact that you forced the plot to a point where it is Shirou trying to woo Mordred that I absolutely despise. Also, you have now created a super predicable ending. The conclusion will be betrayal from Mordred because of love for Shirou, and then either history will repeat itself with Shirou largely unable to actually change anything (which could lead to a grail war that I could further predict)
Googl7
2019-01-08 15:23:33 +0000 UTCI find I am fine with the way things are, it was a bit jarring, but if you have an actual plan for this path I would be more than happy to read it. Having an athur filled wih regret in a what if, and see how she confronts her past inhuman(perfect seeming) actions will be alot of fun to see. Also, I think britain is sexist(as every other country is at the time), this way at least Arthur has reputation behind her more than the sword alone when coming out as a woman.
Shance
2019-01-08 13:59:52 +0000 UTCI don’t see a problem with the current arc. It makes Shirou’s original goal harder to reach and fits him somehow as all he seems to remember is to protect the girl with green eyes and golden hair. Typical E-rank luck, but it sets it up in a unique way. As a curse or outcome, this fits perfectly with what Morgana would have wanted to happen. The Shirou that Arturia relies on is gone or out of the picture. From a plot perspective, she has weakened Arturia considerably in morale. Putting Shirou into a coma would instead divide Arturia’s attention from ruling and makes her a vulnerable ruler with him defenseless as a weak point. Your current Arturia would have to lead on, believing that he was well and truly gone. This possibly places events closer to a canon continuity at this point, and would test her trust and faith in the ideals he had taught and supported. Your current arc has given her the greatest potential to grow or to remain stagnant, either way has great potential as more is revealed and characters reunite. Some of the Knights of the Round will know him, see him, and judge the interactions between the two, therefore questions will be made. You’ve got a lot of characters that looked up to him, seeing their Beast Hunter as a shell would be jarring. Mordred beginning to put pieces together, that he was the source of the Wolf Unit power would make for a good point for a schism. And let’s be honest, it wouldn’t be Shirou if there weren’t several females vying for his attention. As far as that’s concerned, what you have now is the best outcome and starting point for where you want to go. Leave it as is. You had to rewrite parts of Vasto before, and that was for the best since the changes were rushed and didn’t make sense. Here, a rewrite is possible, but isn’t needed. This is an AU. That doesn’t mean happy ending, it doesn’t mean readers get to choose the good end, it means you chose to explore something that hasn’t been tried before and YOU MAKE IT WORK. Don’t change it. Keep moving forward with the plan you made. If people complain about how you write your great story, remind them: “Just because you’re correct doesn’t mean you’re right.”
G1Splicer
2019-01-08 13:57:17 +0000 UTCAlthough the step from Arturia to becoming less reliant was a good step, it still felt a little bit too jarring to me. I’ve always enjoyed their interactions and was looking forwards to seeing the creation and Camelot and such but to have it taken a different way suddenly seems like a rather large leap of faith and a leap away from what initially drew me in. As a suggestion maybe something akin to a coma If you’d still like to consider then”Arturia becoming independent route? It’s just a suggestion of course but the amnesia into Camelot is fully established into Mordred focus seemed a bit much. I guess the best way to describe it is how I’m on the fence about how to feels sorry if this doesn’t really help.
Skrubstar
2019-01-08 13:20:06 +0000 UTCI agree with the opinions of readers. This leap of faith in the story is just too big. This isn't the first time i read this kind of story with amnesiac characters, but Shirou is not made to become an amnesiac a second time. He already doesn't know his childhood and this furthermore just makes Shirou an empty shell. From what I read, i understand that Shirou just reverted back to nothing and the only thing left of the original is the instincts. So please, revise a different route, I really liked the way the story went.
KingLochas
2019-01-08 13:16:20 +0000 UTCI think the main thing I looked forward to in this story was how Shirou and Arturias relationship would change things like the marriage with Guinevere to quest for the Holy Grail. I wanted to see what Shirous invocation of Siegfried might possibly effect Arturias interactions with the Saxons. Then it was all torn away in an instant. The Arturia that was forming in this story was different then any ive seen protrayed before and that was exciting. I would truly like to see them coming together and ruling. Also Shirou being Duke Ashton and how he wound up in Fuyuki.
Darth_Chinran
2019-01-08 09:58:31 +0000 UTCPersonally I don’t really like the whole amnesia angle. I feel like it is something that is often done just to make characters change drastically almost for the sake of change. I really would like to see how the story and Shirou and Arturia’s relationship developed going forward coming across new challenges as they try to overcome the challenges of running a kingdom together.
Evan Cooksley
2019-01-08 08:30:48 +0000 UTCI'm not completely sure of the problem? I'm loving how the story is playing out right now with Shirou and Mordred developing a relationship and am looking forward to how it will turn out when Arturia enters the picture (which I hope doesn't happen anytime soon). It feels like there's a lot more story to be told. So, under the assumption that this story still has a lot left (which I feel it has) it seems like the current route is working fine. You could go back and revise I suppose, but unless you wanted to erase the outcome of ch. 43 (which I don't think you should do) then I don't really see what to be gained. So, in summary, I really like how the story is developing currently and say that you should just continue ^^ PS: Talking about Shirou, Arturia and Mordred I mean that it's entertaining. I don't have an expectation for some three-way relationship. You do what you want in that department ^^
CyanMax
2019-01-08 08:23:47 +0000 UTCI was loving where the story was going with Shirou's and Arturia's building relationship, though I'm not sure about this latest twist. It seems like a reason to place canon Artuia into the story when she was growing into a different person.
Karnath
2019-01-08 08:21:30 +0000 UTC
