Onion Nuggetz 9/30/25
Added 2025-09-30 18:00:12 +0000 UTCGoing LIVE @ 5 pm EDT!
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Scotty appeared behind me at the grocery store. He told me "You've got a Scot-detta on you, boy..." as he poked me in the chest repeatedly, chuckling to himself. Then he began singing "Don't come around here no more" by "Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers" under his breath while staring at the floor, sunglasses still on. He looked up and asked me, "You ever think about how the human nervous system is the meat, and the human skeleton is but the shell? You ever think of that, snail boy?" I was so stunned that I just stood there and watched in frozen fear. He then forcefully grabbed a can of Monster from the minifridge and a pack of Mentos from the display next to the conveyer belt. He smiled a devilish Skittles™ brand skittle-filled smile(All the skittles did indeed have the letter "S" on them. I thought they came in alphabet?) He started quoting passages from the Anarchist Cookbook in latin, not that I would know. As he slowly approached, I realized it was Garbage Day for me if I didn't skeedaddle away from the "Skittle Lord", or "Skittle Kahn" if you will, so I did so as soon as it were possible. It were possible...then. My shoes squeaked as I waddled across the shiny laminate flooring, going as quickly as a lord of lard could carry his greasy little baby knuckles, and then to the burning blacktop. My feet turned to cinders and cream filling as I ran, leaving great black pencil streaks across the lazyboy tarpit of the european country sized strip mall. Eventually I managed to hop into the passengers side of my pretty little souped up daily drive. A 2002 Fiat Multipla in "Technicolor Dreamcoat" with chrome plated seat cushions...and the cupholders to match. I took a good luck glug from my sugar slut before I skittered off like my little skittle depended on it, hoping this wasn't a trip that'd come with the bonus flashbacks on the "waffle" house. The thing is, though, and looking back this really is the scariest part of the whole ordeal...I don't even have a groceries...
Clay Jordan
2025-10-02 08:14:25 +0000 UTCVideo won’t play
Mondo_Bruh
2025-10-02 04:54:24 +0000 UTC
