Stumbling Up: A Loser's Guide to Progression - Chapter 30: Terms and Disqualifications

"So now what?" Leo asked the question we were all thinking.

"Now, Richard tells us where we need to go to find Meredeath a [Sponsor]," I said it with more confidence than I felt.

We all looked at Richard. He was very resolute in his study of an ashy leaf on the ground. The slug wouldn't meet our eyes.

"Richard!" I was done with it. I knew he was more than what he seemed.

I'm right here. You don't have to yell.

"Where do we find Meredeath a [Sponsor]?" My patience was thin.

“Can you tell us what a [Sponsor] even is?" Tandy asked, her voice a bit softer.

No.

"No, you won't tell us?" I was about to fling the slug into the horizon.

"Or no, you don't know?" Tandy asked, trying to smooth over the situation.

Richard sat on the stump, the victim of our ire. One of his eyestalks was pointed at me, and the other at Tandy. It had to be the slug equivalent of going cross-eyed. I was sure he was trying to make us laugh, but I wasn't in the mood.

I am abstaining from this conversation.

His antenna sank into his body, not completely, but enough to mimic a door slamming in our faces. His body pulsed, exuding slime that smelled of fuck off.

Tandy and I shared a glance. We were going to revisit this topic with him later. At least the rest of the team could hear him talk, and he wasn't just ganging up on me.

"How about we talk to him?" Our heads swiveled to the small shack Meredeath was pointing at. Ironically, the building I hadn't bothered considering as a good shelter had withstood the fight and the blast. It was the only structure on the ridge.

Malyc's eyes were wide as he examined his home. His ceremonial gold-trimmed crimson robes looked out of place in the devastation. My anger at Richard pivoted hard.

"Hey, Administrator Malyc!" I waved, my voice sickenly upbeat.

His head turned, with a look of surprise. I realized he hadn't expected any of us to survive that fight. The man picked his way between rock and upturned tree, holding his robes off the ground in a losing attempt to keep the hem out of the ash.

"Congratulations are in order!" Malyc called as he trundled his way up to us.

I'd never had an opinion of the Guide Administrator. Never thought I’d need a measure of the man. He'd just been an official who visited Woodsten every couple of months.

Now? Now, I low-key hated the guy. I couldn't look at his face without remembering his back disappearing into that little shack. Abandoning me. Abandoning my team.

It was hard for me to change my opinion of the guy after that.

We'd all stood up to greet him. Tandy'd elbowed her way next to me and grabbed my arm with the grip of a weaver. I got the message. Don't say anything.

Her voice came out smooth as butter, "Administrator, so good to see you. We did fight off the bear and survived the [Trial Dungeon]."

"Yes! My region now has four new [Adventurers]! This is fantastic!" he said with a proud father grin, as though he had anything to do with our success. The pot boiled in my head.

"So, you're one of the Administrators for the region, right?" Tandy asked innocently. It was always nice to see one of her traps working on someone else for a change.

"Yes, I own the Bear Ridge Testing Ground," his voice trailed off as he looked around, noticing that the testing portal no longer existed. He cleared his throat, "and the Northeast Mountain District. You're familiar with the Adventurer Guild's district system, correct?"

The way he said it, you knew immediately, only uneducated mundanes didn't know the guild's districting scheme.

Leo and I put our fake smiles on and nodded. I mean, I knew what a district was. It wasn't hard to figure out that the Northeast Mountain District probably encompassed Woodsten and the area along the Ursine wall, up north, to the sea.

Malyc puffed up at our nods. I shrank the size of the district in my mental map.

"I'm sure you're aware of Meredeath's special qualities as an [Adventurer]?" Tandy asked, smiling as though Meredeath's status was as evident as the sky was blue. The words unspoken, only a mundane wouldn’t inherently understand Meredeath’s worth.

"Ah, yes, it seems as though she managed to integrate into your party successfully! This is excellent!" The man's words didn't match his expression. He was evaluating Meredeath with a skill, trying to figure out what was so special about her.

"Yes, she was very key to…" Tandy waved at the destruction around us. The ash had finally stopped falling, but it'd muted everything in the ridge in a grey blanket.

Malyc's eyebrows rose. "That is truly impressive. I'm glad I was able to secure her for your trial."

"Personally, I think we need her for our region," Tandy emphasized the 'our' leaning into his ego. "We're a new group of [Adventurers] and Meredeath's just got some experience and powers that integrate incredibly well with the team. She gets results. You know?"

Malyc nodded, swallowing the bait hook, line, and sinker.

"Yes!" He turned to Meredeath. "I hope you're open to staying here with us. This region is remote, but as you can see, it presents numerous challenges. And a lot of opportunities! We have roaming dungeon-born that make it over the wall. You don't get that in the West. We don't regulate our dungeons, so there are no lotteries or lines. Just making your numbers go up, fight after fight."

He spoke as though these were rehearsed lines. Like the frontier was a cult he'd tried selling to urban [Adventurers].

"I could see staying," Meredeath said. We all watched as Malyc's eyes lit up. Before he could say anything, she continued, "with [Your Mom's Party]. It really depends on where they want to go."

Malyc turned back to Tandy, appraising her. I realized, as he started to look hopeful, that he'd underestimated Tandy. It was a good reminder that [Appraisal] and [Analyze] only gave you skills and numbers, but weren’t an accurate measure of a person.

"I'm sure you three want to stay local?" He said it, addressing Leo. That was a mistake. Tandy hated it when someone assumed Leo would make the decisions because of his height, muscles, and gender. Leo grinned, waiting for the hammer to drop.

"That depends," Tandy said with an edge of steel in her voice. Malyc's eyes swung back to her, sensing the impending danger. "On whether you can help us with a few things."

"Well, part of my job is helping new [Adventurers] get on their feet," his voice was guarded, a little less hopeful. "What can I do for you?"

"We need a [Sponsor] for Meredeath, I'm sure if you were to sponsor her..." Tandy's confident voice trailed off as Malyc blanched.

"H-how long do you have?" His voice had taken on a mournful, nervous quality.

"One month," Meredeath's voice was flat, like she'd been expecting the disappointment we were all feeling.

"I can't [Sponsor] you."

The words were a slap. Meredeath’s jaw tightened.

Leo unstrapped his axe. "Can't or won't?"

I stepped in playing the good guy role, "Leo, I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation. Right, Administrator?"

"I can't, I'm not high enough level. I'm just an Administrator, I'm not even an [Adventurer]." Like a tumbler lock, everything started to make more sense. He was just a paper pusher.

"If that's true, how'd you open the portal?" Tandy asked.

Malyc's face reddened as he replied, "It's an artifact. A magical key. I just slotted it into the arch..." And it just worked for him. I began to wonder if they even knew how to replace the [Trial Dungeon] portal at all. The Administrators were caretakers of [Adventurers], artifacts, and systems they didn't even understand.

"But you know who could [Sponsor] Meredeath," I said, confident that he did. The power of Administrators was in who and what they knew. Malyc had been afraid when we told him she needed a [Sponsor]. A man like him wouldn't be frightened of something he didn't know.

Yes, you're starting to understand.

"I do, but regrettably, I doubt it's going to do you much good. There were two individuals who had sufficient levels within a month's journey of us." His voice finally rang with honesty.

"Were?" Tandy asked. Meredeath's face was still downcast. No part of her was expecting a solution.

"Yes, one of our [Sages], Leon Orren, joined the Everbear." Leo gasped. Leon Orren, the short king, was renowned for his short blades and overpowered buffs.

"That's unlikely," Tandy argued. "We'd have heard about it."

When we were kids, Leo had convinced half of us that he'd been named after the famous [Adventurer]. Leon had mostly worked out of Dusridge, a trade hub two weeks south of us. If Leon had fallen, everyone would know about it.

"I would posit that you have the evidence before you. I no longer have a border guardian, and the corruption of the wilds is pressing hard.” He'd waved at the crater we sat in. Point made. “Leon was still in his prime, but [Adventurers] have a dangerous job."

"You said there were two?" Meredeath's voice was quiet.

Malyc looked at her. He let out his breath in a blusterous exhale, his shoulders sank as though he was releasing all of his verbal posturing.

"I did, my dear, but the second person isn't so much an option as a legend. And she's a legend you don't want to pursue."

“Let me guess, some mythical forest hag that eats men’s livers for a snack,” Meredeath said in a verbal eyeroll at our guild administrator.

An awkward silence sat between us all. It stretched on, making me think Meredeath's joke had been right.

But who was he talking about?

Tandy got there first. Her voice was acerbic. "The bone lady? You're going to send us into the swamp after Rhi Voss?" Malyc flinched with each syllable.

Abso-fucking-lutely not.