Fitting In.

I don’t think I’ve ever actually gotten “stuck.” I think that kind of scenario is something that mainly finds its home inside of breast expansion stories.

Don’t get me wrong, there have been some tight squeezes. Phone booths are rare, but they do still exist; it’s actually been a long time since I’ve been in an elevator, but if there are a lot of people in the lift, you can imagine an elbow or two intentionally or unintentionally digging in; one time, I was touring some ancient castle here in Spain. That was a little interesting… It was a small tour group, and at one point, we all had to squeeze through this narrow hallway that was more secret passage from Clue than anything. Everybody did pretty well, except for me and this very large German man. I think he was a little embarrassed too, about barely being able to squeeze down the narrow corridor. We didn’t speak each other‘s languages, but we did look at each other after we squished our bodies through, and shared one of those eye chuckles. I think each of us would have been quite a bit more embarrassed had the other person not been on that tour for some unintentional but much appreciated moral support. But getting actually stuck? It’s never happened. (Yet.)

A good friend of mine owns a camper. He took it out recently, and remarked that it’s a little oddly shaped. There’s a long hallway that goes down the center of the camper, all the way to the bedroom at the back, and the hallway tends to narrow as you get closer to the end. He wondered to me if I would be able to squeeze through without touching walls, so we did a little experiment.

He sent me the picture with the paper towel roll and the Snapple bottle. So, I decided to dig out a tape measure and did a horizontal version of those height charts your parents used to do on the door frame in the living room.

I didn’t know this before, and I apologize for the metric system, but in translation, I’m about 17 inches deep, and a little over 18 inches wide. According to the picture, it looks like his tape measure clocks out at about… 16 inches? 😬

So, it’s not difficult math to do, I suppose. The really funny thing? My measurements were taken in my sturdy-but-reliable, relaxed-fitting, low-hanging house bra. If I would’ve dared pull out one of my heavy-duty, hoist-them-up underwires for my measurement? I think we might be looking at another inch or two of depth.

Some people talk about not being able to fit in… Yeesh. I’m sure there’s a metaphor in there somewhere about the necessity of pushing yourself a little.