Beholgar
Added 2024-07-23 00:02:03 +0000 UTCDid you know that we currently live in a world where a Hot n Ready Pizza and a 2 liter of Pepsi comes to 13 dollars? That's how i know civilization is nearing the end of another cycle, and soon the oceans will rise up to drink this cursed land the same way they did Atlantis in ages past.
I long for a new Hyborian age, where one such as I can live free and be King of my own legend. Back in the time of Conan, you could get a hot meal and a warm woman for the price of a single gold coin, pillaged from a snake-cultist you beat up earlier that afternoon.
This badass game isn't an official Conan title but i mean, come on, look at it. It ain't being shy about it's influences. If it were any more Conan-inspired the final boss would be a masturbating bear.
I'm about to pass out and hibernate like a damn bear because I'm full of disgusting spongey pizza. Feels horrible. I suffer more in this modern world of so-called convenience than i ever would in an ancient era of clashing steel and dark sorcery.
I am not made for this time. My cat just shat herself and I'm about to as well.
