Japan trip (01.19.24)
Added 2024-01-19 08:55:21 +0000 UTCHello! It’s been a while… Here I am in Shinjuku, Tokyo. I was in Kawasaki for 2 days and loved how peaceful it was there, while here near the heart of Tokyo it feels chaotic. I’m enjoying the experience but at the same time my insecurity has been getting the better of me.
I’ve always been insecure of myself due to my general development as a person, so being in such a discipline society that works hard, it makes me feel bad about myself because I’m still far from my own dreams, on top of that I’m always insecure about my own appearance despite working on improving it these last few years, it’s like I have lingering body dysmorphia back when I was obese. I posted last year so some might know that I lost 100lbs, but living a whole life being overweight took a long term toll on me I think because I lived a life without much positive affirmation.
Now that I’m here in Tokyo, my lack of communicative ability has been bothering me as well, I know foreigners come here all the time without being able to understand much Japanese, but still I have the underlying feeling of intrusion. People have been kind here, it’s been a wonderful city, I just didn’t feel ready for it due to my own personal problems. There’s always that feeling of loneliness too, here and back home. It’s difficult to stay encouraged doing everything in solitude.
Anyway, I hope you’re all doing well. I’ll be joining a short tour guide tomorrow just to have the experience, maybe after that I’ll run home to my hotel and spend the rest of the time drawing, it’s been a while and I think I could use a mental and physical break.
Comments
I know what you mean feeling like you can’t communicate, but a lot of it is in your head. All the English signage and the Japanese people wiling to play charades with you is proof that they want you here, and many of the locals are too busy keeping their head down to feel like you’re intruding. I really recommend those kinds of travel tours with guides and similar, as getting that social interaction with someone who you can speak and joke with recharges your social battery. heck, I even recognize hiring a private guide to make a day go by so smoothly and you see all the stuff opening up to you. and if you need any more recommendations for introverts feeling isolated in Japan, dm me, was literally there two months ago
Poptard
2024-01-19 13:22:59 +0000 UTC
