SLIPPING INTO DEPRAVITY - Ch. 35, Apology gone horribly wrong

KAYLEY

The Enslavement of Helen and Colin, Part One

I waited in the parking lot, checking the restaurant’s back entrance in my rearview. I leaned back against our car, folding my arms, and resisted the urge to check the time.

What had come over me that night? How had I been so out of control? I’d gone wild. I didn’t recognize myself. I had said and done things that I could only look back at with absolute horror.

The worst part was dragging an innocent person into this. Leroy, me, Sam. None of us were innocent, we were all involved and at play. We knew what we were doing, had consented, had gone in with our eyes open. We were all playing the game.

Colin? He wasn’t part of it. I’d brought him in, lied to him, gotten him to cross boundaries and do shit that could have gotten him fired, and then treated him like a sex toy, not even wondering whether he really wanted this, or whether he was in a relationship

I really didn’t want to be here. But I felt I had to. I needed to make things right and come clean. Apologize.

I didn’t want to walk into the restaurant. That would be awkward for him and I didn’t want to make things worse. So I made a few phone calls, found out when he was working, and when he would go off shift, and so voila, here I was in the parking lot.

It wasn’t all that inconvenient, I wasn’t being a stalker. Actually, the timing was great, I’d finished work and had almost an hour to drive over and figure out what I was going to say. Dignity this time, no ‘fuck me’ ball gown this time. I wore my business armor. A deep blue skirt and jacket, the skirt a little short but thoroughly professional. With a red silk button up blouse, buttoned all the way up, I might add. I felt it would add conviction to the apology, show him that I was a person of respect and dignity... As opposed to whoever I’d been that insane night.

Colin came out the back entrance, chatting with co-workers. His gaze passed over me without recognition. I thought that was a good sign. Maybe he didn’t recognize me. Maybe he’d forgotten the whole thing. It could be he did this all the time, and he’d just dismissed the whole thing.

He’d walk by me with barely a puzzled glance, living his life, and I’d be spared this awkward encounter. I could get in the car, drive home and forget the impulse that lead to this fool’s errand.

Throwing a puzzled glance in my direction, he waved goodbye to his co-workers, put his hands in his pockets, and started walking in my direction, seemingly lost in thought.

Then, suddenly, perhaps a couple of dozen paces away, he looked up, saw me again, focused, and a shock of recognition passed through his body. He almost lost a step. Expressions flickered across his face. Surprise, confusion, intimidation, uncertainty.

Ah fuck, this wasn’t going to be that easy.

“Hello Colin,” he said.

“Uh...”

“Kayley,” I reminded him. I wasn’t sure if he remembered my name.

“Right, Kayley,” he said. “What are you–”

“I came to apologize,” I said, letting the words rush out. “What I did was wrong, and disrespectful to you. I am so sorry. I don’t know what came over me. It was a strange night, and I guess I had too much wine, or something, and I was getting carried away. And that was all right, but then I got carried away with you, and made you part of our game. I didn’t respect you, and I didn’t respect boundaries. And I’m so, so, so sorry. I should have been more considerate. I’m ashamed. What I did was wrong and I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

He stared at me for a moment, with those startling blue eyes. I couldn’t help it, those eyes, they made me wet.

“Okay,” he said. He thought for a moment, looking at me with those startling blue yes. Those blue, blue, blue eyes. I wondered for a moment if maybe I could give him a blow job to make up for it.

I had this imaginary flash, part sense, part taste, part vivid image. Him looking down at me with those stunning blue eyes, while I knelt before him with his cock in my mouth. Suddenly, I was wet.

Down girl!

We’re not living in a porno, this is not something that actually happens!

He chewed his lip.

“Maybe you should explain this to my wife,” he said finally.

Oh fuck! I thought. I felt a pit open up in my stomach.

“You told her what happened?” I asked, haplessly.

“Yes.”

Oh fuck, this was bad. He’d told her. I’d begged him not to. Now their marriage was fucked up. I wanted to run away. This was outside my pay grade. Oh fuck. There was no way I could handle this. I’d just screw it all up.

Take some responsibility Kayley, you had to at least try. This was going to be so unpleasant. She was going to call me names. She might cry. I hope she didn’t attack me physically.

“Yes,” I said. “I suppose I could try to explain it to her, that this is my fault, not yours.”

“She’s standing right behind you.”

I froze.

FUCK! FUCK! FUCKETY!

I turned around. Oh shit. Colin’s wife turned out to be a tiny little thing, slender, waifish. I guessed 5 foot in flats. She had limp black hair, huge hurt-looking eyes, an expansive forehead and no figure to speak of. Well, at least she probably wasn’t going to try to beat me up.

“Yes,” she said, in an I’m-going-to-kick-your-ass-anyway tone of voice, “explain it to me. I would like to hear it.”

I was blushing, I could literally feel sweat running down my back, pooling at my butt cheeks. This had been such a bad idea. I should have just taken my guilt, balled it up and shoved it down into this tight little knot in my stomach along with all my other sins, lies and betrayals.

“Well...” I began. Very quickly, I decided that the whole cuckold thing was going to be too complicated. So I settled on trying to explain it as sexy humiliation games, and dominance and submission, and control as foreplay, with the big payoff later, and how it was done with love. And how I’d roped Colin into innocently participating. And really, I shouldn’t have, I was so very very very sorry. I felt terrible.

She listened, her face neutral, not even blinking, just staring at me with her big owl eyes.

“So where does sex with my husband come into this?” she asked.

Ouch! Fuck me,!

“Well,” I began again. “It shouldn’t have. I mean, that’s what I feel so bad about. That and all the other things. I should have never done that. Totally on me. It’s not Colin’s fault...”

Still staring.

“I just got carried away,” I admitted. “I mean, he has these amazing blue eyes, and every time he looked at me...”

I just trailed off before I dug myself in deeper. The corners of her lips twitched just for an instant, like there was almost a smile, coming and going so fast it barely registered. Yeah, she understood about those blue eyes.

And it wasn’t going to help me a bit.

“So...” she said finally, “you’re one of those women who dresses up in leather outfits and whips men?”

“Uhm...” I wasn’t sure where to put that. “A Dominatrix? I... guess... sort of... I don’t have a whip. But... Yeah?”

I totally wasn’t, but then trying to explain the fucked up scenario I’d gone through with Leroy and Sam, and the history of that complicated relationship seemed impossible. Any way I looked at it, it just got weirder and more messed up. They wouldn’t think I was a dominatrix, they would think I was some weird, pathological, insaniac sex freak.

“You’re right,” I said. “I’m a dominatrix. I was doing ... dominatrix stuff at the restaurant, and I got carried away and roped Colin into helping me mess with a... client.”

“And then you had sex with him.”

Flat, emotionless, judging

Gods, I am such a horrible, amoral slut. Everything I said made it worse. Made me sound selfish, and reckless, nearly sociopathic. A cheap skank that simply uses people for her own pleasure.

“I got carried away,” I said lamely, realizing how stupid it sounded.

How was it that I kept making things worse for myself?

She nodded thoughtfully, those big eyes blinking owlishly at me. She looked at me for a long time, as I steadily grew more ashamed of myself.

“Show me,” she said.

Wait. What? What did she just say? What did that mean?

“Excuse me,” I said carefully.

“Show me," she repeated, her voice flat.

Still confused, I asked, “Show you what?”

“You say you’re a dominaticks,” she said, “I want to see.” She pointed at her husband. “Do it to Colin. Dominate him.”

“Uhm,” I whispered. “Dominatrix. I can’t do it in public... And I don’t have any gear...”

She shrugged.

“You did it in a restaurant full of people. There’s no one here. Now do it, I want to see.”

“You...” I was trying to be very careful. “You want me to prove I’m a dominatrix?”

My unspoken thought: And somehow, to her, that would explain or excuse my fucking Colin? How? Maybe because then she'd be assured it wasn't Colin's fault? He'd been unable to resist me. Okay, but then she'd hate me. How much would she hate me? Like, enough to attack me. She wasn't very big, but you can never tell. But ... she wouldn't beat me up if I was just doing what she said. She wouldn't have a very good opinion of me. But if it got Colin off the hook....

Yes. I needed to suck it up and take it for the team.

“Yes.”

That was absolutely crazy, but there was a certain amount of screwed up logic to it that I could almost follow. Unless...

“You don’t mean for me to hurt him, do you?” I asked. God, what if this was some revenge thing to punish Colin. “I don’t hurt people, not for real. That’s not what I’m about. I’m sorry. I made a mistake. Worse than a mistake. You can punish me. But he doesn’t deserve–”

“I don’t want you to punish him,” she said, “or hurt him. I just want to see.”

I stared at her, she stared back. Over to the side, Colin cleared his throat nervously. I glanced at him, his startling blue eyes were confused. He had no idea what the hell was going on either.

“Okay,” I said. I just gave right up. Maybe she should be the dominatrix.

Now what?

Fuck me? I had none of the wild mood from back at the restaurant when I was a cruel sadistic sex machine. I'd been in the zone. Now I was in a fucking parking lot.

I straightened up, squared my shoulders, tried to put on a bitch face, and folded my arms. What the fuck was I going to do?

To buy time, I let my gaze swivel, pretending that I knew what I was doing and actually planning something. I was really self conscious. This was way too out in the open.

“Too open,” I said curtly. I snapped my fingers. “Let’s go over behind the cars.”

The simple act of moving, and watching Colin’s ass precede me, got my brain functioning again. Oh my god, that ass! Eyes to die for, and an ass like that! But I was thinking again, the terrified paralysis was wearing off. I realized I had this. I’d dominated the fuck out of Sam twice, I had experience, so... messing around with Colin for a five minutes? Piece of cake.

“Have a seat,” I waved to Colin’s waifish wife, “uhm...”

“Helen.”

“Right, Helen,” I said. “Have a seat, relax, we’ll make sure you get a good view.

I turned my attention back to Colin.

“That’s a nice ass,” I said. Can I bite it? I forced the thought down.

“I hadn’t really noticed in the restaurant.”

“Thank y–”

“Shut up!” I snapped. “Speak when you’re spoken to.”

I strolled around the front of him, trying to think of my attack. How about ‘I caught you looking at my breasts, you little bug, and I decided to punish you...’ No, that made me sound psychotic.

‘I caught you looking at my breasts and decided to play with you...’ No, I was trying to save his marriage not wreck it more. I couldn’t play him as the asshole.

Play the slut? That would let him off the hook, and I couldn’t imagine she was ever going to think well of me.

“Oh those blue eyes,” I said. “He does have the most startling blue eyes, doesn’t he?”

No response from Helen. I sighed mentally, I was going to have to do all the heavy lifting myself. I locked gazes instead with Colin, which was not a hard thing. Oh those baby blues.

“Oh those eyes, those eyes,” I said to him. “The minute I saw them, my heart skipped. Those are panty-wetting eyes, if I’d been wearing panties then. I almost forgot who I was with. The minute I saw them, I knew all I wanted to do was wrap you around my little finger.”

“From that point on,” I said, “all I wanted to do was tease you and tempt you. And you were easy. So easy.”

I tried a fiendish laugh.

“Men are so weak!”

I paused thoughtfully.

“I should have paid attention to whether you were married,” I said. “I should have checked. My fault. I went too far. I apologize to you both. Well, I apologize to Helen. I have never apologized to a man, and I’m not going to start now.”

I shrugged, nodding to her. Hopefully they wouldn’t dwell on the last ten minutes of groveling to Colin.

“Now,” I said conversationally, not quite looking at Colin, “on your knees please.”

Colin looked surprised, he glanced at Helen.

“DON’T LOOK AT HER. YOU LOOK AT ME! ONLY ME! UNDERSTAND?” I snapped loudly. They both jumped.

“Do you understand?” I snarled, rounding on Colin. He stepped back, intimidated. I took another step. “I said, ‘I said, do you understand?’”

“Y.. Y.. Yes!”

He looked way. I caught his chin, and guided his face back to me, until I was looking straight into his eyes. Still startling blue, but now surrounded by white. I was scaring him, it was kind of exciting. I should stop though... in a little bit.

“Then what did I say?” I asked gently, and all the scarier for it.

“Uhm...”

“Use your words,” I demanded.

“You said look only at you, not Helen, just you?” he said hopefully.

I chewed my lip, looking up and to the left, as if for inspiration, and then shrugged.

“Close enough,” I said genially. I let go his chin, and stepped back, letting him relax. Then I waited a beat. Then I frowned at him. The frown got darker, deeper. I lifted a hand and snapped my fingers.

He got down on his knees. I hoped the pavement wouldn’t mess with his pants. I looked down at him, examined my fingernails, and sucked in one cheek, pulling a face. I sighed.

“Well, at least you’re not completely useless,” I said.

I stepped towards him, looming over him, looking down. His head was bowed. I snapped my fingers again.

“Look up,” I ordered.

“Possibly barring that ass,” I said, “those eyes are your best feature. You should be doing whatever you can to stay on my good side.”

His mouth opened. I held up a finger. He shut it.

“Now,” I said thoughtfully, “I know, that being a man and being weak willed and all, you’re probably wondering if I’m wearing panties right now. After all, I wasn’t wearing them the other night. But what about today? Maybe, maybe not. I guess it’s fifty fifty.”

I touched my little finger to my lip and pulled down, I’d picked it up from some old movie somewhere. I remember it had been silly, Sam and I had laughed.

“You know, in all this excitement, why I completely forgot. I guess you’ll just have to look for me.”

“Would you like that? Would you like to help me out that way? Take a peek and let me know whether I’m wearing panties.”

He didn’t take the bait.

“Honestly, I don’t really care what you would like, and I certainly don’t need anything from you. But I will do you a little favour and maybe let you look.”

I stepped past him, and put my foot up on the bumper of the car next to us. My skirt rode up, not in an ‘exposing myself’ way, but definitely showing a lot more leg, and emphasizing my hip.

:So here’s what you’re going to do,” I told him. “You’re going to lick my shoe, I’m not even going to be demanding. But if you want to see up my skirt you do have to earn it. So just one little lick. Then you’ll say ‘May I look under your skirt to see if you’re wearing panties, Miss Kayley?’ and I’ll say ‘Yes.’ And then you can look. Got all that?”

“Uhm–”

“Never mind. I don’t care,” I told him. I snapped my fingers twice, and pointed at the shoe I was resting on the bumper. “What I do care about is you wasting my time. Chop chop.”

He started to get up, I shook my head, and he went back to his knees, and shuffled over to the bumper. He bent forward, nervously. I dipped my head towards him.

“Psst,” I hissed quietly. “Don’t lick the shoe, it’s hot hygienic, just touch your forehead.”

He touched forehead to my shoe, rubbing it and looked at me. I lifted both eyebrows expectantly and nodded.

“Uhm...” he began. I made a waving motion, get on with it. He actually blushed, oh that was so adorable. I almost wanted to kiss him. “Uh Miss Kayley, may I have permission to look under your skirt to see if you have panties on?”

“You mean,” I said, “with foot still up on the bumper, you’re asking to bend way down and crane your neck to look? Because I certainly am not giving you permission to touch my clothes, and I absolutely will not lift my skirt for you. Is that what you meant?”

“Uhm... yes?”

“That’s what I thought you meant,” I nodded pleasantly.

“The answer is no.”

I took my foot off the bumper, and glanced over at Helen, sitting on the hood of the car next to us. Her face was expressionless, but she nodded. I nodded, back, relieved.

"And that's how it's done," I told Helen triumphantly. "Men are such weaklings. I love to bend them, or break them. Have you seen enough?"

Oh please let that be enough. I had no idea what do do for an encore. Force him to lick my pussy? Not outdoors in a parking lot. It was tricky, I mean, what we could get away with out here? I just really felt like I was on the spot.

She nodded.

Oh thank god. I was off the hook. Well, glad that’s over with.

“Now do me,” Helen said

What? I thought.

“What?” I asked.

“Do me now. Show me.”

“Why?” I demanded. This was very unfair.

“I want to see what it’s like,” she said. “What you did to him.”

“But you just watched it.”

“I want to know.”

She just stared at me with her owlish gaze, hands perched like pink spiders on her knees as they pressed together. Helen was creeping me right out. I looked to Colin for support. He was still on his knees, waiting for permission to do something.

“Oh get up,” I ordered. “You look silly down there.”

Actually, it didn’t. He didn’t look silly at all. He looked distracting, very distracting. It was sinful, a man with eyes like that on his knees, looking up at you.

“... and that can’t be good for your pants,” I finished.

I turned back to Helen.

“I really don’t know–”

“You owe me,” she said. “You had sex with my husband.”

Guilt!

“Okay, fine,” I conceded. “Give me a minute to switch gears. Oh and get your ass off that car!”

She practically jumped off. Good start.

“And get over here,” I snapped, pointing at the ground in front of me. She scrambled over. Well, at least she was obedient, I thought.

“Well,” I said dismissively, “at least you’re obedient.”

Now what, you creepy looking bobblehead, I wondered? I fixed her with a glare.

Bobblehead?

Geez, when did I get so mean? But it kind of worked for the glare.

“Now,” I said sternly, “let’s be very clear on something. You’re asking for this. But I’m not your toy. You’re mine! You don’t tell me what to do, you aren’t giving orders, you aren’t in control. I am. I’ll show you what I do, because I want to. Understand?”

She nodded.

“That would be, ‘Yes Miss Kayley, I understand.’” I sniffed.

She bowed her head and mumbled, “Yes Miss Kayley, I understand.”

“I didn’t hear that,” I said, “please enunciate.”

“Yes Miss Kayley,” she said very carefully, “I understand.”

I smiled beneficently at her, not that I needed to, because her eyes were downcast. You better keep your eyes down, I thought. Patience, I thought, how do I handle this. Be mean, but not too mean. Pretend mean, be nice. What to do with her? I lifted a hand, and twirled a finger.

“Turn around,” I ordered, just in case she didn't understand the gesture.

She turned around slowly, as I pretended to critically appraise her. My initial impressions didn’t change. Skinny waifish body, head too big, owlish eyes, thin lips, way too much forehead and flat limp hair.

“You’re a very attractive young lady,” I said finally.

I didn’t mean it, she was a creepy little bobblehead.

She kind of half-flinched and half-smiled, as if she wasn’t used to getting any kind of compliment. Even if I was just bullshitting her, and kind of annoyed with the whole thing, my heart went out to her just a little bit.

“Anyone ever tell you that?”

The half smile turned up a few watts.

“Colin does,” she said, you could tell from the warmth that crept into her voice that he was her whole world. And I had peed in that swimming pool when I fucked him. Oh god, I am such a bitch. Guilt all over again. Say something nice, I thought.

“I knew there was something I liked about him,” I offered. “He has good taste.”

Her eyes drifted over to him

“Eyes forward!” I snapped. She whipped straight head, staring off into the distance.

“Don’t look at him,” I snapped. “Look at me!”

Her eyes fixed on me.

“Who gives orders?” I demanded.

“You do.”

“That’s right. Who obeys orders?”

“I do.”

“That’s right. You like to obey my orders. Obedience makes you happy, doesn’t it?”

She looked a little nervous, as if she was sensing a trap. There’s no trap, sweety, I thought, I’m making it up as I go along.

“Say yes,” I prompted.

“Yes!”

“Because your obedience makes me happy, and you want to make me happy. Isn’t that right?”

“Yes!”

Where the fuck was I going with this?

“All right... I am going to kiss you, because that will make me happy. And you want to make me happy.”

“Yes?”

“Now,” I said, “I have no idea why. But it turns out that men get very excited and turned on when they see one girl kiss another. Are you okay with that? With Colin getting very excited watching me kiss you?”

“Yes.”

“His penis will get very hard?”

“Yes.”

“He will want to take you home right away and make passionate love to you. Is that okay.”

She blushed.

“Yes.”

Get the message Colin, I thought, once this is done, you guys go home, have sex, forget about me and all is forgiven.

I dipped my head to kiss her. She was staring at me, like the creepy little bobblehead she was. I stopped and withdrew.

“Close your eyes,” I ordered.

She closed them. Carefully, I bent forward, lowered my head, and being careful not to touch any other part of her body, gave her a brief, chaste kiss. No tongue obviously, no pressure of lips, just a gentle touch. My grandmother had given me harder kisses. I withdrew.

She sighed, and her whole body did that ripple thing.

“How was that?” I asked.

“All right,” she replied without opening her eyes. Her expression was so carefully neutral I had no idea whether she had enjoyed it or been offended.

I smiled carefully.

“Well,” I said, “that’s all right then. I hope that this sorts things out. You guys go home, make sweet sweet love. I’m so sorry for all the misunderstandings, it will never happen again. We’ll all just move on–”

“Now do us both,” she demanded.

What the fuck! Seriously!

Fuck!!!

“Out here?” I asked, exasperated. “In the parking lot? In public? Out here?"

I was incredulous. I had a hundred different ideas as to how this might go, and this was absolutely none of them. How the fuck had it gotten to this? Were they playing with me? Was this all some horrible kink role play to get back at me?

“We could go to your Dominaticks place,” she said.

“Dominatrix,” I corrected automatically

“It’s a lair,” Colin offered, “a Dominatrix cave.”

“Dungeon,” I corrected automatically.

“Yes,” she said, glancing at Colin, a tilt of her head mocking Colin’s ignorance, “Your Dominattic dungeon. I want you to dominatrix us both–”

“Dominate! That’s what it’s called. A Dominatrix is the noun, dominates is the verb. A Dominatrix dominates,” I snapped. This was out of hand, I felt annoyed and cornered.

“I want you to dominates us both. If you can dominates two men at once, you can dominates both of us together. In your dominates dungeon.”

They were fucking with me.

“Sorry,” she corrected herself, I could see the little tiny wheels turning. “Your Dominatrick dungeon.”

They weren’t fucking with me.

“Dominattic,” she corrected herself again.

Fuck!

Well, I wasn’t taking them home. Jesus, how would I even explain this to Sam? What would I even say? And oh god, I absolutely wasn’t taking them back to Leroy’s place. He’d eat them like fried chicken.

“Sorry,” I said, “the dungeon is closed. Renovations.”

“We could do it at our place?” Colin suggested.

“Yes!” she said nodding quickly, “that would be good.”

“I uh...”

Think fast Kayley!

“I don’t have my leather suit.”

“You don’t need it do you?” She asked. “You didn’t need it out here. You didn’t need it in the restaurant when you had sex with my husband.”

Guilt!

“You’re right,” I said surrendering. I sighed heavily.

“Your car?” I asked.

“We take the bus.”

Oh damn, so every day, she takes the bus to meet him when he comes out of work, and then they go home together. It was so much like Sam and me, that automatic, instinctive love. I felt even worse.

“Let’s do this,” I said morosely

What the fuck just happened?

&&&

I drove. They sat in the back, every time I glanced in the rearview mirror, they were sitting stiffly at attention, their respective knees pressed together, holding hands, fingers intertwined, with pale looks on their faces.

They looked like they were going to their mother’s sentencing for murdering their father. Why were they so glum. I was the one cornered into this.

“You know,” I said, “we don’t have to. I can just drive you home. If you’re not comfort–”

“You had sex with my husband,” Helen cut me off. This was getting very familiar. “You used him like a toy, a bystander in your game. You owe us the respect of treating us like people. We’re not toys.”

“Right,” I said, struggling to follow whatever passed for logic in their heads.

Or in her head.

Fucking creepy little bobblehead. She could get a part time job at Halloween playing one of those weird chicks that crawls out of television sets, or maybe a haunted evil doll. Maybe she had, and she'd just decided to marry Colin.

I decided I didn’t like her one bit.

Helen seemed to be in charge. Was this because Colin had fucked me and she was getting back at him somehow? Or at both of us? Or was she usually in charge? What the hell was going on?

“I really am sorry,” I said. “I’m so so sorry.”

“Sorry doesn’t matter,” Helen said. “You have to make it right.”

“Well,” I said, “just give me directions to your place.”

What just happened? How had a simple heartfelt apology turned into an apparent S&M threesome. Where had I gone wrong in my life?

Had I slipped into some sort of porno dimension? No, Colin wasn’t hung like a porn star and he certainly didn’t last like one.

We drove into a region of modest, seventies-era, apartment buildings. There was outdoor parking, including visitors assignation. A hand lettered plywood sign said “All Visitors must be gone by Midnight or will be towed.”

Their apartment was a third floor walk up, no elevator. It was a modest little place, open kitchen with a few mismatched chairs and a small table, a futon for a couch in what passed for the living room. Most everything looked second-hand, but in good condition. I assume that one of the closed doors represented the single bedroom. A calico cat rubbed up against me.

The only thing really surprising was the art. Almost every available space was covered by prints, often cheap ones - a poster for a Picasso show, a tattered Pointilist reproduction, a Van Gogh flower vase. Mixed in were a lot of religious kitsch, paintings and crucifixes. A bible was prominent in the single, mostly empty book case. Helen noticed my attention.

“We pick them up at garage sales and things, not worth anything but nice,” I glanced out the window. From the orientation, they didn’t get sunrise or sunset, and the view was just the dull yellow brickwork of the apartment block next to them.

“I appreciate nice,” I said diplomatically.

Helen pointed out some riotous swirl of colour that seemed oddly pornographic, if not for the lack of any discernible form, florid initials in the corner read ‘BCK.’

“That’s an original, a Cjherskiszky, from a raffle at the art school. Colin won it for me.”

She seemed quite proud of it.

“You like art?” I asked Helen.

“I like beautiful things,” she said.

“What do you do?” I asked.

“I work in a pet warehouse.”

Suddenly, I didn’t want to know about her job.

I felt bad. Colin and Helen were clearly younger than I was. Maybe university age, but they weren’t going to university. The two of them were working together, struggling to make ends meet, trying to hold onto a shitty little apartment full of secondhand furniture and garage sale art. They were just kids really, all they had was each other and I’d walked in and fucked up their relationship.

I felt like one of those assholes who, when you’re walking on the sidewalk in the rain, drives through a puddle and soaks you with muddy water. Whether it was deliberate or accidental, you’re still in shock, soaked to the skin in cold dirty water, brutalized by a callous indifferent world.

I needed to make things right. If that involved carrying through on whatever fucked up notion Helen had... okay, sure.

Sure.

Dominate them.

How exactly?

I turned to look at them.

Fuck, they were looking at me. They were looking at me expectantly, like puppies. Sex puppies.

I needed an instruction manual? A plan? Post it notes? Okay, Kayley, here’s what you do. Take control. You’re in charge. So... how to establish dominance. Pee on them? I suppressed a giggle. I needed a commanding position. A throne. None of this ratty furniture would do. Highest furniture to sit on? The kitchen table.

I snapped my fingers. “Follow.”

I walked into the kitchenette area, stepped up on a chair, and sat my ass on the corner of their kitchen table. I pulled another chair over, and propped my other foot on it. It was kind of wanton looking, but also kind of sexually powerful. Okay, work with this.

“Stop,” I held up my hand, they were closing on me. “Back up a couple of feet.”

They obeyed. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. They did want to be dominated, didn’t they? Assuming my idea of domination was the same as theirs.

What was my idea of domination, anyway?

I fixed them both with a dominating stare, whatever that was. It involved just a little squinting, and looking serious, like my smart phone charger wasn’t working.

“Last chance to back out,” I told them. Actually, I wasn’t going to enforce that but it had sounded good for Sam, so why not here. The minute they wanted to back out, I was going to be magnanimous, permit them, explain how it wasn't for everyone, and get the hell out of there. “Before we go further, you both have to agree to go forward. If one of you doesn’t, it’s over now.”

They looked at each other, reached out to touch fingers in a gesture I found heartbreaking, and then first Colin and then Helen nodded. Helen swallowed.

“You have to say it,” I said. “In or out.”

“I’m in,” Helen said quickly.

“I’m in,” Colin said, more firmly.

Ah fuck.

I nodded wisely, trying to figure out what to do next. It occurred to me suddenly, that 90% of my domination with them amounted to desperately stalling for time while I tried to figure something out. Was that the secret of S&M?

“First step,” I said. “Take off your clothes. Both of you.”

Helen glanced at Colin. I snapped my fingers.

“Nope!” I said. “That’s an order. When I give you an order you obey. You don’t ask questions. You don’t look at each other. In fact, no more looking at each other! You look at me, only. Got it.”

Helen nodded, looking a little frightened.

“Words!”

“Yes!” Helen said.

“Yes Miss,” Colin said.

I snapped my fingers twice, looking expectant. They got the message, unbuttoning and pulling off their clothes with awkward haste.

“Even my underwear?” Helen asked shyly.

I rolled my eyes.

“Did I explicitly to say leave your underwear on?”

“N.. N... No?”

“Then....” I raised an eyebrow.

“Take them off too?”

I nodded ever so slightly. She slipped her panties down, wiggling out of them, before reaching behind to unhook her bra. Interesting choice. Colin was covering his junk with his hands.

“Hands at your sides,” I snarled. “No covering yourself.”

The bra fell away. They both stood there, blushing and naked, bare foot even, in their own apartment. I glanced at the curtains to make sure they were closed.

Colin was as I imagined him from the restaurant. His figure was slender and androgynous, no body hair that I would make out beyond his pubic thatch. He was already erect of course. Smaller than Sam, sharper curve than Leroy, uncircumcised. I noted a birthmark on his ribs, a scar on his knee. Pale, he didn’t get out in the sun much. Delicate, but masculine features, and oh blue eyes to make my panties wet.

Helen was a bit shorter. Naked, her head was slightly too big for her body. Her arms and legs were skinny, she had narrow hips and small breasts with huge gumdrop shaped nipples. I wondered if they were sensitive. I’d have to find out. She had a thigh gap, which is some weirdo male fantasy thing. The oddest thing was her pubic hair, it was just this narrow scraggly band, on either side of her pubes, climbing up to join at her pubic mound. From the length of it, she wasn’t shaving, she had a natural bikini line. Like Colin, she was pale.

Now what do I do? I had no idea. Why was this my problem? Maybe it should be their problem? Wait...

“All right,” I said, “you’ve pleased me. Now, I’m going to ask you some questions. You will answer them immediately and truthfully. If I catch you lying, if I even think you’re lying, I’m out of here.”

They both said yes.

What is your favourite colour? Geez. Come on Kayley, take this seriously. I had no idea what to ask. Seriously, what do you say in a situation like this.

“How old are you?”

They both said nineteen. Okay, good.

“How long have you been together?”

“Since October 18 last year,” Colin said.

“Why October 18?” I asked.

“My birthday,” Helen said. “I turned eighteen. That’s when we got married.”

“Uhm... we’d kind of been going out for a few years,” Colin explained, in response to my surprised look. I hadn’t actually wondered about that. “Technically, not going out, we weren’t allowed... but seeing each other anyway.”

“I see,” I said. I didn’t, it sounded fucked up, but I didn’t care and didn’t want to get into it.

“How long have you been sexually active?”

I could almost feel them wanting to look at each other.

“Since October 18 last year.”

I nodded. Somehow I wasn’t surprised.

“How many sexual partners have you each had?”

I was pretty sure I already knew the answers.

“One!” Helen said.

“Two,” Colin admitted.

Oh geez, I could see where this was going.

“Two?” I said. “So one of them... Helen, and one of them was...?” I twirled my finger.

He nodded. I covered my face with hand, suppressing a groan. Oh that was so fucking unfair! It was like two minutes if that. It shouldn’t have counted. I’d had handshakes that lasted longer.

“Yes,” he said. Because of course.

I turned to Helen.

“And he told you all about it?”

“Yes.”

“What did he tell you?” I asked Helen.

She licked her lips, trembling a little, staring at a point at the wall over my shoulder.

“He said you were at the restaurant with two men, your husband and this other man who had invited himself that you wanted to punish.”

“That wasn’t my husband,” I said too quickly. Leroy as husband? Ick! Ick! Ick!

“Your date. Sorry. He said you started flirting with him, to get him to punish the other man, but that you seemed to start to like him. That he was very attracted. You showed him your breasts. Then after, you took him into the supply closet and had sex with him. He said he was weak and couldn’t resist you. You were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.”

Oh geez. It was amazing Colin still had a marriage. Why couldn’t he just shut up like I told him?

“You said all that, did you?” I directed a withering gaze at Colin, my voice was cold. “You told your wife, who, I assume, you love that I was the most beautiful woman you had seen?”

I paused. Seriously, what the fuck, Colin? I thought.

“If you ever do that to her again, or anything like it, I will find you and whack your pee-pee with a ruler. Hard.”

Colin swallowed.

“Say ‘Yes Miss Kayley.’”

“Yes, Miss Kayley.”

“Now apologize to Helen.”

He looked at her.

“I’m sorry, honey.”

“It’s all right, Pluffy.”

She gave him a nervous half smile.

Barf! Honey? Pluffy? I was going to go into a diabetic coma.

"You both understand what the apology is for?"

They looked blank. Oh fuck me, geez!

"Colin is apologizing for disrespecting you by saying I was the most beautiful woman he had seen."

"And for having sex with you?" he said.

I rolled my eyes. Yes, we all needed that reminder.

"That too," I said.

"It's okay that you had sex, Pluffy. I understand."

Oh no! Creepy little bobblehead self pity!

“How’s your sex life?” I asked suddenly to change the subject a little.

“Great,” Colin said.

“Wonderful,” Helen replied.

“What do you do?”

“We have sex.”

“What do you mean by sex?” I asked.

“You know...” Helen replied. “Sex.”

“Positions?”

That seemed to confuse them. Helen glanced at Colin helplessly.

“Eyes front. Don’t look at each other,” I snapped.

“The normal positions,” Helen said quickly, and then corrected herself. “Position.”

I thought so.

“Do you go down on each other?”

Total confusion on their expressions. Okay, forget that.

“Do you French kiss?”

Helen grinned suddenly, grinned and blushed, a flush that reached all the way down to the tops of her breasts. The girl lit up like a Christmas tree. Suddenly, I kind of liked her.

“Okay,” I said, to save them from embarrassment. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

I’d taken this as far as I could go. I could ask more questions, but what would the point. STD’s? Not a chance. They seemed awkwardly naive, given the state of genital grooming and the conversations so far. I had this impression that they were oddly sheltered. Een after a year, they were only vaguely aware of sexuality. Maybe I would be surprised, but I bet if I asked them about sexual practices, positions, anything, I could predict the answer.

I thought for a moment. Stunningly naive, I really felt out of my depth. The best thing I could do for these two would be to walk right out of their lives. Whatever they really needed, and I couldn’t even begin to imagine where they would need to start, I couldn’t give it to them.

“Were you guys home schooled by any chance?” I asked.

Helen put up her hand.

I looked at Colin.

“My church had a classroom.”

“Hmmm,” I asked. “How did you meet?”

“His Dad was courting my Ma,” Helen explained. “So he’d send Colin over to do chores. Colin had to work out in the world. We kind of fell in love, but they wouldn’t let us marry, so when I turned eighteen...”

“You ran off together?”

Nods.

Honestly, I was shocked that Colin had the wherewithal to piss in Sam’s soup. If he had, after all. The facade of confidence he’d projected as a waiter was just that, a facade.

Well maybe not.

They’d both been out in the working world, I assumed. They’d have made friends with co-workers, been exposed to life, had learned some stuff. Cut off from church and family, they only had each other as they made their way in the world. That took strength. The shitty little apartment with its second hand furniture and garage sale art prints took on a different hue now. A sanctuary, a nest, a place filled with each other, cherished and loved.

“Colin,” I said. “Do you love Helen? And beg her forgiveness?”

“I do.”

“Tell her that, then,” I ordered.

He turned.

“Helen, I love you and I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”

“Helen,” I said. “Your turn.”

“Colin,” she said, she didn’t even hesitate. “I love you so much, you never have to ask.”

Barf.

I clapped my hands together.

“All right,” I said cheerfully, “I think we’re done! You guys are good. It’s been fun. But I think what you need is each other.”

“That’s it?” Helen frowned.

Oh fuck.

“I mean, you have us here naked, and now you tell us it’s over? You make fun of us and now you’re going to leave?”

“I didn’t make fun of you,” I said defensively.

“You asked if we were home schooled,” Helen said. “I know what that means.”

“I didn’t mean anything by that,” I back pedaled.

“And you had sex with Colin,” she said. “But now you’re not going to do anything?”

Oh fuck me! Not this again! I was getting tired of it. I mean, I felt really bad, but now they were just working it.

“This kind of thing is slow,” I said, looking for an escape route. “It’s about trust, and taking people as far as they can go and be comfortable.”

“I just thought there’d be more!” Helen said, she was getting upset.

“Like what?” I asked.

“I don’t know!” she replied, it was almost a cry for help.

Oh fuck. I sighed loudly.

“After this point,” I said, “it gets serious. I mean it. I’ll dominate the fuck out of you. I’ll do whatever I want to both of you. I’ll do all kinds of shit. You won’t be the same people after. Maybe you won’t even be able to look at each other, after. Or look at yourself in the mirror. I’ll make you my sex toys. My pets. Are you ready for that? Are you willing to take the risk?

Nods.

Oh fuck. I was never getting out of here!